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Charlie's Aspergers (and General BS) Thread!

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by PennSilverTaco, Dec 5, 2016.

  1. Mar 31, 2019 at 4:01 PM
    ABA180

    ABA180 It burns when I pee....

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    How long has it been?
     
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  2. Apr 10, 2019 at 9:22 AM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    @ALI3NS
    @ChadsPride
    @El Duderino
    @Gr8fl
    @Jamesboy2233

    One thing guaranteed to make me angry is saying that I did something I did not do in order to make yourself look better and/or get me in trouble...


    The earliest example of this that I can remember took place in 4th grade; It was towards the end of day and the teacher had split us into groups for some sort of science project if I remember correctly. An argument took place between me and another classmate.

    I do not remember what this argument was about as it was at least 20 years ago.

    A girl in my group told the teacher I had hit her, which was not true. I told the teacher I didn't hit anybody, but two or three other classmates chimed in and gave false statements to the teacher that I had hit this girl. The teacher believed them...

    One of my favorite things to do at the end of the day was draw pictures of trucks while I waited for my bus to be called. My teacher made me put my head down on the desk and didn't let me draw while I waited for my bus as punishment for something I didn't even do.

    I was not suspended or anything, and I'd forgotten about this incident (which happened in 1998 or 1999) until recently.
     
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  3. Apr 10, 2019 at 9:27 AM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    The second incident (that I remember) took place in 6th or 7th grade (so 2001-2002ish). A couple of kids were picking on me, and a confrontation ensued. This happened right outside the scholl library, and the librarian heard it and came out to investigate.

    The librarian brought all three of us into the library and asked us to tell her what was going on.

    One of the kids says that I called him a faggot, which was not true. I immediately started screaming at the kid, and I would have kicked his ass if the librarian wasn't there. The confrontation ended with the librarian sending everyone to class and nobody getting in trouble.
     
  4. Apr 10, 2019 at 9:36 AM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    Another incident took place in 2006 or 2007, when I was in 12th grade...

    My gym teacher jokingly called me "Lazy Charlie" in class one time. My gym class was a mixture of "normal kids" and "special needs" kids. One such individual was a kid named Gene.

    One day after school, I was trying to talk to a girl I liked. Gene came up to me and kept saying "Lazy Charlie! Lazy Charlie!"

    I asked him nice to cut it out, and he didn't, and I ended up pushing him so hard that he nearly lost his balance. Needless to say, that shut him up and I though it was over and done with.

    A day or two later, I get pulled out of class and taken to the security office, and I find Gene sitting there with one of his teachers, the assistant principal, and the head of security.

    Gene had claimed that I'd just walked up to him as he was getting into his van and shoved him without provocation. I probably looked like Hank Hill when he's really angry and his veins are bulging.

    I read the riot act to everyone in that office, saying that yes, I had in fact pushed Gene, but he had been bothering me and I only pushed him after asking him nicely to stop.

    Everyone believed my story, and I was made to shake hands with Gene and "bury the hatchet." Neither of us got in trouble.
     
  5. Apr 10, 2019 at 9:52 AM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    One of the more recent incidents took place in early fall of last year. I know it was September or later because I'd already started working at Fred Beans, but it was probably sometime before Halloween because it was warm enough that I had the A/C on in the truck.

    This old woman in a Toyota Corolla stops in the middle of the road, with a green light, to ask a beer truck driver directions. It was a 3-way inersectikn, and the beer truck was parked in the straight lane that I normally would have been using. It's a small town with like 30 bars, so beers trucks parking in random places to unload is just a fact of life.

    The Corolla was stopped in the middle of the left turn lane, and I had no way to pass her her because there were cars in the opposing lane. I was running late for work, so I just laid on the horn. The woman in the Corolla moved and the beer truck driver gestured at me to calm down. I may have threw my hands up at him in frustration, but did nothing else.

    We had a red light at the next intersection and the old woman got out of her Corolla and walked up to my truck. I rolled the window down slightly, not knowing what to expect.

    I told her that was I was late for work and she was blocking the intersection, so I beeped at her. She was British or Scottish, and she said in her accent "I don't care about your job! I'm loost!" That's exactly how she pronounced "lost"...

    I rolled my window up and ignored her until she got back in her car. She then proceeded to take her sweet time getting back into her car, buckling her seatbelt, and shifting into drive. Meanwhile, the light was green and there were a couple of cars behind me, but I dated not beep again because I figured that would just piss her off even more.

    So, you'd think that would be the end of it...

    NOPE!

    Close to a week later, my boss at Puck (the sweet Asian girl who's also one of my closest friends) says she needs to talk to me. Okay, whatever...

    She then proceeds to ask if I'd had an incident while driving where I blasted my horn at somebody and then flipped off a beer truck driver...?

    At first, I had no idea what she was talking about, then I remembered the "British bitch in the Corolla." I then realized that the beer truck driver she'd stopped to ask directions also delivered to Puck (he was a new guy).

    I proceeded to tell my boss everything that had happened, but that I had never flipped off anybody. My boss expressed concern that I was going to beep at the wrong person and get my ass kicked (I agree with her and have mellowed out since then). She asked me at one point if I was sure I hadn't flipped off the beer truck driver.

    I said something along the lines of "Who are you going to believe? Your trusted employee of almost four years, or some asshole beer truck driver?"

    The matter was dropped...
     
  6. Apr 10, 2019 at 11:54 AM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    And then let's not forget the most recent incident, which took place this past January, just two days into the new year!

    My friend got into argument with the person she was staying with, and this person subsequently kicked her out of her apartment. My friend had no place to go and literally had all her belongings with her at Puck. A friend of mine agreed to take my other friend in, so we loaded up my Tacoma with all of her possessions (including a flat panel TV) and left Puck for the other friend's house in Chalfont.

    I was super tired because I'd worked at the detail shop that day, and I'd spent another few hours at Puck with my friends. I consumed a few non-alcoholic beers, but no real beers or anything else with alcohol in it.

    I stopped at a three-way intersection. The light was red. The combination of my drowsiness and my half-drunk friend yammering away in the passenger seat caused me to zone out. I stopped at the red light, looked both ways, and then somehow came to the conclusion that I was at a stop sign and not a red light. The intersection was clear, so I proceeded through.

    The next thing I knew, I saw red and blue lights behind me, but what weirded me out at first was the fact that this a Chevy Express van. Central Bucks Regional PD has Chevy Tahoes, Ford Explorers, Ford Expeditions, Ford Taurus Interceptors, at least one older Crown Vic, and possibly a Charger. There are no vans. Turns out it was a sheriff's deputy in a prisoner transport van...

    I DID NOT know why I'd been pulled over, and when he asked me if I knew why I'd been stopped, I told him I did not. In my advanced state of tiredness, I legitimately did not know why I'd been stopped. Unfortunately, Deputy Dickhead misunderstood and probably thoight I was being a wiseass...

    He asked for my license, insurance, and registration, and I asked for permission to go in the glovebox so I wouldn't get a gun pulled on me. He said it was okay and I handed him my papers. He then went back to his van and that's the last time I saw him.

    I called my parents on the Bluetooth and went on a rant, saying a few unkind things about Doylestown cops. Unfortunately my window was open, and the deputy probably heard those unkind things, but I think that even if I'd been a total kiss-ass I still would have gotten the ticket.

    So, Deputy Dickhead disappears with my license and paperwork, and we just sit there for a good twenty minutes.

    Then, a marked CBRPD Tahoe showed up after what seemed like an eternity. The cop goes right over to Deputy Dickhead's van and we wait even more.

    Finally, the officer comes up to my truck and says "Here's your citation." I responded with a frustrated "Damn it!" and the cop has the nerve to tell me to calm down, that I was being recorded. He didn't even give me chance to explain the situation. He said that I almost caused an accident, and that if I chose to fight the ticket he and the deputy would be there in court.

    Did I go through a red light? Yes...

    Did I almost cause an accident? NO!

    I didn't even think I'd run a red light until I got home and reviewed the dashcam footage with my parents.

    My parents initially wanted me to pay the ticket and take the points on my license, but I am not going to lie...

    I wanted to get one up on Deputy Dickhead. The next day I called the lawyer who owns Puck and he said he could help me.

    My lawyer somehow talked the deputy into not coming to court. He also made a deal with the officer who wrote the ticket, where another officer who had to appear in court on another case would take his place. He also got the violation reduced to some obscure charge that carried a $25 fine and no points on my license.

    I primarily fought the ticket because a charge of running a red light could have cost me my job at the detail shop (my boss knows about this, by the way), and also cost me my ability to drive with Uber. Not to mention the increase in my insurance rates.
     
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  7. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:50 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    The secondary reason I fought the ticket was to be a dick. I admit that I ran the red light, but what the deputy told the cop was quite far from the truth. He made it seem as though I didn't care about the law, and blatantly ran the red light because I had places to be and thought I was better than everyone else.

    The truth is that I was tired, and I was going straight at an intersection where I normally turned left. I was also distracted by my intoxicated friend yammering in my ear! I also treated the red light as a stop sign and did not just "run" it. None of these are any excuse for it, but I have a feeling that if the cop had seen me do it, I would have gotten a chance to explain myself and possibly gotten off with a warning like the last time I got pulled over.

    The thing that pisses me off most is that the deputy blatantly embellished the truth to make himself look high and mighty to the real cop. I do not really blame the cop, since of course he's always going believe another LEO over the "suspect."

    The other thing that pisses me off is that this was little more than a citizens arrest. The deputy had no authority to write tickets, but for whatever reason he was agitated that night and wanted to see me suffer, so he wasted my time as well as his own waiting for a real cop to show up.

    The one thing I blame the responding officer for is not getting my side of the story. He listened to Deputy Dickhead's one-sided story and just wrote a ticket for a violation he didn't even personally witness.

    I like to think that I won the case, because I got no points on my license, and my insurance rates will not go up.

    All that deputy succeeded in doing was lowering my opinion of the Bucks County Sheriff's Department.

    The verdict: I really don't like bullies, whether they're of the teenage variety, or they're wearing a badge!
     
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  8. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:51 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    Since Puck closed? End of January so more than two months...
     
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  9. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:51 PM
    Taco critter

    Taco critter Mall crawler proud , patw and ,ttc#0247

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    Amen brother
     
  10. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:52 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    Amen to what, specifically?
     
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  11. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:52 PM
    Taco critter

    Taco critter Mall crawler proud , patw and ,ttc#0247

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    The bully part
     
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  12. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:55 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    Charlie
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    That deputy was a bully, and maybe he didn't realize how much he put my livelihood at risk, but still...

    Police have a lot of discretion, and if I were a cop, I'd take things on a case by case basis and carefully assess every situation.

    Obviously if the driver is doing 50 MPH in a 25 MPH zone and blows a red light, I'd give them a ticket...

    But what I did? Come on!!! Really?!?!
     
  13. Apr 10, 2019 at 2:57 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    @Taco critter

    I would also like to point out that my PennDOT record is pretty much flawless. I got one other ticket back in 2017, for speeding, but it was reduced to 5 MPH over and didn't show up on my record.
     
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  14. Apr 10, 2019 at 3:34 PM
    ABA180

    ABA180 It burns when I pee....

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    Oh damn how come
     
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  15. Apr 10, 2019 at 4:19 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    Major renovations. I'm detailing cars at a dealership until I get a job in HVAC.
     
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  16. Apr 12, 2019 at 1:58 PM
    Gr8fl

    Gr8fl Some rise, some fall, some climb.

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    Do they know when it’s going to open? That’s where the School of Rock does most of their shows, we’ve been doing them mostly at the school in the mean time which is a little cramped.
     
  17. Apr 12, 2019 at 4:24 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    Labor Day weekend at the earliest?
     
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  18. Apr 13, 2019 at 8:02 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    I had a very bad day today...

    Two of my Neon Tetras died a few weeks ago without me realizing and decomposed, which made the ammonia levels in my tank skyrocket and kill my pleco. Without the pleco keeping algae in check, it only took about a week for my tank get really disgusting. I came home from work today to find one of my four remaining Neons dead. I removed all of the fish and changed most of the water in the tank.

    I kept five of the fish in a large pitcher which has a poor design for emptying back into a tank. So, I transferred them into the pitcher I use for emptying and filling the tank. I did this over the kitchen sink, which was full of water. One of my Glofish Tetras jumped out during the transfer, and landed in the sink. I exclaimed "Oh !" because I was startled, but didn't panic for long because after all the tank was mostly full of old tank water that these fish had been living in for weeks. My Glofish are generally really docile and easy to catch, but this guy was flapping all over the place. I attempted to scoop him up with a plastic cup and realized with absolute horror that the water was HOT! It was not boiling water, obviously. It was probably about the temperature I take a shower in, but to a tropical fish barely larger than a quarter, it was almost instantaneous death. The reason the poor little guy was swimming around so frantically is because he was being scalded inside and out!

    By the time I scooped the fish out, he had already passed on, and he got a one-way trip on the porcelain express.

    I planned on transferring all four Glofish to my 30-gallon once I get it set up and cycled, and I am absolutely devastated that I essentially boiled one of my pets alive. It was a total accident, but I love all my pets like members of the family, whether they bark or swim.
     
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  19. Apr 22, 2019 at 8:31 PM
    PennSilverTaco

    PennSilverTaco [OP] I have Ass Burgers...

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    See signature!
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  20. Apr 22, 2019 at 8:33 PM
    ABA180

    ABA180 It burns when I pee....

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