Empowerment and Motivation

Let’s Empower and motivate each other because time doesn’t stop for anyone and we’re all here on earth for a very short time.

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A palliative nurse who has counselled the dying in their last days has revealed the most common regrets we have at the end of our lives. And among the top, from men in particular, is 'I wish I hadn't worked so hard'.

Bronnie Ware is an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care, caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives. She recorded their dying epiphanies in a blog called Inspiration and Chai, which gathered so much attention that she put her observations into a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.
Ware writes of the phenomenal clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how we might learn from their wisdom. "When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently," she says, "common themes surfaced again and again."

Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as witnessed by Ware:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

"This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it."

2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.

"This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence."

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

"Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result."

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

"Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying."

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

"This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again."

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying

 

People go off and want to complain and moan about the group/organization behind this one. Blah blah blah, me smaht u stoopid. Ignore all that and just take it without context, it was the most important 3:20 of my life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6bUUmelbyw

 

Make your own luck. Take care of #1. Work hard. Enjoy what you have.

 

Sounds like drinking more whiskey would solve all of those regrets. Maybe create a few more but it would be a different list at least.

 

Every day is a new day!

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8HVqdvuf_6/?igsh=MWJvdXVreG03ajJxYg==

 

A year ago I was watching a video on weight loss. They said something rather poignant.

That weight loss was not a straight line from A to B, but rather a hike up a mountain, full of detours, peaks, valleys, sometimes easy walks, sometimes challenging climbs, and the occasional obstacle that is so difficult it makes you want to quit. The important bit that they stressed about the metaphor, though, was to not be so fixated on reaching the top that you miss the scenery of where you are right now. Enjoy where you are, appreciate the climb you have done so far, and then keep climbing. The point of it all is the journey, not the destination.

And that best describes my personal meaning of life. We are all travellers. Some of us get so fixated on a destination that we never enjoy the scenery. Others get so fixated on the scenery that they stop travelling. I think the answer lies somewhere in the middle. To travel for the joy of travelling. To grow, learn, and progress for the pure joy of growing, learning, and progressing. I put my goals behind me - My goal is to be a better human than I was yesterday. That's it. That's the destination, to be better than you were. It is not the things that are important, nor is it any measurable goalpost that you can imagine. It's the journey. Be grateful for what you have seen, and keep on climbing.

And in that, I'm successful, I'm grateful, and I have a long, long ways to go.

 

It's convenient to say "I wish I had worked less" on your deathbed when you have $ left over. Being poor sucks, being poor and old really sucks.