Gardening Thread- Show me your gardens!

My daughter didn’t take it too kindly when I told her I was gonna shoot the cat if it keeps shitting in the carrot bed lol
I (think) she knew I was just kidding lol

 

Lol

 

I hate to say it, but I've seen the stray cats taking dumbs in the garden like it's a liter box.. I feel like stinging them in the buttox, especially this one tomcat, like to pop him with a well place bb to the nuts (he's a little ass anyway, he instigates/fights with other cats and may have contributed to killing a niegbors older tom cat)..
But I really don't wanna. I just have the thought, when I see them all arched up mid dump, then trying to cover it like they just planted some crop. bb wouldn't do anything anyway at that distance, pellet would be a better option, but wouldn't wanna "put it's eye out",if it turned around after pinching a loaf off.

 

Maybe in the future, they'll have garden perimeter automatic tazerz systems, kinda like a trail cam, except with a super accurate electric (harmless) darts... Have all the creatures intruding in the garden falling over like fainting goats..

 

It wants a mater samich

 

Or...
You could just run some electric fence. I had to do that with mine, to keep the damn chickens out. I have a 4 foot wooden/wire fence, but they kept jumping onto the top board and then down into the garden to eat my tomatoes. So I ran a length of electric wire across the top and put it on a solar ticker. After they got lifted a few times when they landed on the boards they stopped trying to get in. And it was hilarious to watch them get zapped, too, because the little bastards had probably eaten a bushel of tomatoes by the time I went electric and I was ready for some revenge.

Edit- They also have figured out that it's okay to come into the garden through the gates, if they're open, since once everything is out in the fall I like having them come in and clean up. It's just while everything's growing that I want them to gtfo.

 

Man I wish you would've videoed that. So you could post it here, of course.

 

Nah, it's only a 1/2 Joule unit.

 

Plink 1 with a .22 short, cut his head off, open up the ass end and scrape the guts/lungs out, then dunk him in scalding water and pull all of the feathers out.

 

This will change your life if u butcher many chickens:
https://www.grit.com/animals/whizbang-chicken-plucker

 

For sure. Mechanical pluckers are the shit. But I pay a local place to do it; I can unload 15 chickens at the front door, and 5-10 minutes later I've got 15 clean carcasses on ice at the side door. For me it's well worth the extra expense for the time savings. If I homesteaded/farmed full time, I'd have no problem doing it myself, but between working 50+ hours a week and all of the other tasks/chores I have going on I just don't have the spare time to process birds.

I still do it myself with troublesome cockerels/roo's, but not 15 at a time, haha!

 

Or you could, just get brutal.

 

Speaking of electric fences.. I haven't tried it in a while, but I used to be able to grab our horse/cattle electric fences, and you could watch my muscles contracting every time it'd send a shock etc. People always were astonished or looked puzzled at me haha.
But nobody else could do it or they'd get popped. Including the horses, once or twice was enough to teach them.

 

Chainsaws make a mess, though. Even if they are...

 

I did say brutal.. Think of it as making mini nuggets. Remember KFC popcorn chicken?

 

Yeah, but a saw would mix in feathers and bones too. They're pretty indiscriminant that way.

 

So more like a chicken McNugget?

 

I guess? More like traditional Caribbean jerk chicken, where they butterfly the bird and cook it, and then chop the whole thing up with a giant-ass meat cleaver and you have to eat around the bone fragments.

 

what he said V, nothing goes to waste. NOTHING.

 

Do I wait until the garlic is completely brown before harvesting?