How the F#$k Do I cook a Turkey?

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=how+to+cook+a+turkey

 

x2 on the brine. That's what I came in to recommend. It was the best turkey I made.

 

Cookies... turkeys... sammiches... you guys are so freakin' demanding.

 

Not until you learn some manners.

 

Been fryin them for close to 10 years now & only had 1 small mishap (already opened bag of potatoes w/ extr frost in the bag boiled over). Since, I ALWAYS shut off the gas before I put the bird in, then fire it up after things settle a bit. In less than an hour I can boil a bird to perfection! Got photos in my gallery of last Thnxgvg, boiled a 12-14# turkey & BBQ/Smoked a 12-14# prime rib. We didn't go hungry that day!

 

Get a butterball fresh turkey with the little button that pops out when its done and follow the instructions on the packaging for temps.
The turkey is easy.... the rest of the fixings are the hard part and getting it all done at the same time.

Put a bottle of cheap red wine in the bottom of the roasting pan. Baste (spelling?) the turkey every hour with the red wine.
The liquid (red wine) in the pan makes for a great gravy when you thicken it up (can't remember what my mom puts in it to thicken it...flour maybe?)

 

I think Martie is on strike until she gets HER sammich.

Frying is awesome. But you gotta do it right or it will turn out bad. Brining is also good. If you can, I would fry it man.

 

Cornstarch, probably.

Word.

 

it is flour not cornstarch to thicken up the gravy, but make sure you gradually add the flour, because too much too soon will thicken your gravy too much.

 

be careful on stuffing a bird, thats one of the best ways to get food poisoning from undercooked stuffing in bird juices. I usually just do it as a side dish seperate from the bird. i'd reccomend going simple with a recipe, (like the oven bag method that is very forgiving) the first time around.

 

Or instead of cooking... you could always go to cracker barrel and get the Thanksgiving Dinner. It's of the chain!