I want stories of lunatic neighbors

The insurance may have cut him a check to have the work done and he farmed it out to a volunteer crew and pocketed the cash. Lots of folks do that.

 

True, but having proof of prior gifting I can see why.

 

Used to have a neighbor across the street who let her big Lab out to shit on my yard almost every day. I confronted her, and she always lied right to my face saying she walked him every day and he never craps on anyone's lawn, blah blah, even acting uppity about it. One morning I had to go in early and bingo, there he is squatting out a large steamer right in the middle of my yard. I picked it up with a shovel along with two other piles, and knocked on her door. When she answered, I dumped it at her feet on the welcome mat saying I believe this belongs to you. Her dog was right behind me wagging his tail. That ended it.

 

Sweet Sweet Justice was served in form of a nice steaming pile of poo.

 

Haha I just watch that series on Netflix too

I’ve might have been the shitty neighbour too I have dogs and they bark like dogs bark

My neighbour would call animal control on me every time I wasn’t home and my dogs where barking

 

Almost. It’s just that all of that won’t quite fit on a bumper sticker.

 

see what happens when you legalize. shitstorm, big money moves in and fucks the little guy. goverment gets there sticky paws in it as well and see another opp to give themselves raises. Rage against the Machine!!!!!! rrrrrrr

 

That’s the best kind of Justice.

 

Are you an engineer? I can try a flow chart but I'm just a geologist so it may not be very good I thought i could just classify the DBs somewhat similarly and that would be enough

 

I grew up in a cul-de-sac with a neighbor on one side of me who used to watch my every move as a kid. She would come over and meet my mom before she would even get out of the car after work, and give her a report of the days events.
6 people were over today playing basketball, after a couple hours they all went inside for about an hour and then 2 left...that type of shit.
My mom would just roll her eyes, say thanks and blow her off.
One day she called my mom at work but couldn’t get ahold of her, so she had her paged, to tell her that a black guy came over to play basketball with us.
At some point I think my mom told her off, because she stopped acknowledging us completely.

On the other side of us, we had this guy who was always carrying.
He would be out washing his car, or Doing yard work, or buying girl skout cookies with one on each hip like he was Dirty fucking Harry.
Next to him was an old man who would spend 24hrs a day in his garage doing who the fuck knows.
We would be playing baseball in the
cul-de-sac, and if the tennis ball went in his yard, we would just get out another one, because if you went near his yard he would flip out and start screaming at you.

Now im fucking traulatized as an adult.
We have been in the neighborhood we live in for over 10 years. I’ve never once talked to any of our neighbors, I don’t even look over and wave in passing.
I just assume they are all weirdos.

 

Last place I rented, the neighbor across the street was a retired old man and he would ALWAYS watch me when I was outside doing anything....going to my truck, talking on the phone, sitting on the front porch. It was a guest house that I rented that was off to the side of the owner's main home and I think he didn't like that she was renting it out to "outsiders", so he never trusted me. But man did it get irritating, to the point where I knew it must bother him so much that I would go outside and walk around suspiciously just to drive him crazy. He would come out on his front lawn and stand with his hands on his hips and just stare at me lol. If I waved, he wouldn't move. Just stared. I lived there for just over 2 years and it was like that from day one until I left.

 

We’ve got someone within earshot who sounds like gets drunk every night and forgets how to open the door. “Open the fucking door!!!” Follows by a series of door pounding punches. Then a voice from inside “You need to pull”. Sometimes the person inside lets the dude have at the door for a few minutes before reminding him how to open it.

 

A friend of mine had a true neighbor from hell. Things were good for a couple years, till one day he came home from work and his neighbor had a new paver driveway put in that went 13' foot onto his property. It's a long story that went on for 6 years before he was legally allowed to reclaim his property.

Things got so bad he had a surveillance system with audio installed. The asshole would shoot his truck windows out with a pellet rifle, throw rocks at his house, and one time walked up to one of the cameras, and tore it off his house. Police said the camera didn't show him tearing it off, even thou it did show him walking up to it right before. He kept telling me he had a stack of police reports 2" thick over those 6 years. I thought he was exaggerating till he showed them to me.

They had to drive or walk about 1/8 mile to get their mail and take their garbage cans out. One day the dude was hiding in the trees, and jumped him from behind and gave him a pretty good ass beating. The dude did serve 30 days for that.

Finally the county granted him permission to reclaim his property. He had a big tear the fuck out of the neighbors driveway party. While we were doing it we just got a lot of dirty looks. The next week end he called me and said he could remove another foot of the pavers and asked if I'd help him. He said since there were only 2 of us to expect trouble.

He made sure one of his cameras were pointed in our direction, and had a small recorder in his shirt pocket since we were out of range of his systems. As soon as we walked out there, here he came swinging a baseball bat. He told us the first one to touch a paver would get a bat to the head, all while his wife was screaming that she'd called the police. We stood there and waited for them, he did put the bat back in his house. When the 2 cars showed up one officer talked to him and the other went inside my friends house to listen and watch the video.

Not only did we finish tearing the hell out of his drive, he got to watch from the police car. He served close to a year for that.

Before and after of the way the drive way was and after he changed it. My frinds house is in the middle.





After out handy work the first day.





This is a video he sent me. If you turn your volume up you can hear him pumping up the pellet rifle and shooting from under his garage door, plus some other stuff he put up with for 6 years. I'd been in jail a long time ago. He sold the house and moved last year.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xj5QiC4cLIU

 

I live in the downtown area of my city where the lots are small and the houses are old, lack adequate parking and are practically built on top of one another. It's the kind of place where you learn how to deal with your neighbors but it's okay if some of them don't like you because there are enough to go around. It's pretty much the epitome of a quaint New England town.

I get along with most of my neighbors pretty well and I socialize with many of them on a regular basis. I think it helps that we have numerous bars within walking distance where we blow off steam, watch sports and gossip about city politics. I bought my house 10 years ago and about half of the neighbors were here before me and the rest are newbies or renters.

Some of my neighbors can be passive-aggressive but over the years I've trained them to understand that I don't take them seriously. Good fences make good neighbors, and when the neighbors on one side suggested that I replace part of my aging privacy fence with a smaller chain link fence for more openness I said hell no I don't want to see them all the time.

My one neighbor of note was an older man named Crazy Paul who lived with his wife in a house around the corner from me which I have never actually known to have siding. The siding was gone and the house was covered in tattered plastic sheeting when I bought my house in 2009 and still didn't have any siding on it when it was torn down by the new property owners last fall. At some point prior to 2009 Crazy Paul decided to "renovate" his house by practically gutting the entire thing and turning his yard and rickety barn out back into a junkyard. He was a hoarder and his house became a true shithole. We used to call his barn "Noah's Ark" because there was two of every animal living inside. We don't know what actually transpired in Crazy Paul's life but rumor is that he got tired of rising property taxes and let his house go to shit hoping that his assessment would go down. He sold it to developers and moved out a couple of years ago, leaving the house to sit vacant and condemned until the new owners leveled the property last fall. The new owners actually had to hire pest control and beekeepers to clear the zoological mess out of the house and barn before it was torn down. I have never been so happy to see an excavator in my life.

Another neighbor next door is a stay-at-home mom with too much time on her hands so she obsessively cleans her driveway with a shop vac or leafblower. I mean literally she's out there every afternoon cleaning every speck of dirt off that driveway even during the winter.

 

Dude was clearly an asshole. BUT seeing as how his driveway would lead straight into what looks like a ditch, I MIGHT have sympathized a little. Def would have been necessary to come talk it out before you just install a driveway like that though.

The tear out the driveway party must have been great though.

 

I grew up in the sticks with weirdo neighbors that we never talked to so I just assumed that's how it worked everywhere. I barely talked to my neighbors for the first few years I lived in my house until I got to know them. Now we hang out and have block parties during the summer.

 

I can relate to the rising property taxes thing, but I'm not sure I'd turn my house into a shithole to alleviate them.

 

They ARE all weirdos...and so are you, and so am I. It's just what we choose to be weird about.

When I rented a place in WA, my neighbors knew I was weird and particular about my truck, one lady was super weird about things being on her lawn (leaves, trash, poo, etc), and I had one super nice couple that lived next door that were super sweet and nice and I could never find a fault, but I housesat for them once, and found their 50 Shades of Grey sex dungeon in the basement.

 

I like dogs but I hate the entitled people who own them. I stopped putting my trash cans on the curb a few years ago because I got tired of people dropping bags of dog poo into my cans AFTER they had been emptied by the trash truck. Nothing like the smell of steaming fermented dog poo on a hot summer day.

Back when my next door neighbors were getting their roof replaced, their contractor buddy used to bring his dog with him to their house every day. Problem was, the dog wasn't tied up and would wander around the neighborhood, shitting in everyone's flower beds. When I came home from work one day and found a fresh pile on my lawn I had a little chat with the contractor and told him to go clean it up. He apologized and told me that he always brings his dog to the job site and I said that's fine as long as the dog didn't wander into my yard. I educated him on leash laws and how things work a little differently in town than they do in backwoods Maine.

The lack of common sense astounds me.