Just purchased a bed mat

For an extra $500 you can get it color matched

 

What do you call Mexican midgets?

Paragraphs... because they're not full essays.

 

I'm not your pal, buddy!

 

You know you laughed a little bit...

 

yes, yes i did

 

It's "yawl"

And don't argue with me about it, I used to run a Porsche dealership and we had the best bed mats. I once raced Don Garlits and beat him so bad he quit racing. So if you ever want to see how your junk bed mat compares to my uber expensive Stuttgart Approved waxed cotton kevlar weave balanced and blueprinted bed mat just show up sometime at the Goodwood Festival of Speed, it's where I hang out all the time, with rich people, so there.

 

My buddy tuned my truck just by playing solitaire on his laptop and telling me to hold the battery cables together. If you don't believe me I'll race you.

Also a yawl is a type of sailing ship....and sailing is dumb.

 

I upgraded to the "race" tune and when I went out the next day, my Tacoma was gone and there was ridgeline in its place

 

OK, to counter the loss of power due to the added weight of the mat you're gonna have to do a cold air intake. Now I know you're thinking, "summer is coming up Gunns. How can I get max performance from a cold air intake with all this global warming?" Well that's where you have to be smarter than the weather. You have cold air already on board in the form of the air conditioned passenger compartment of your truck! All you need to do is cut a hole in the firewall under the passenger side of the dash, cold air naturally settles to lower areas so this will be the coolest part of the vehicle. Now, remove the air filter on your engine and run a dryer vent hose from the hole under the filter to the hole in the firewall. Secure both ends with copious amounts of gorilla glue and let cure overnight. Dispose of the air filter, after all the air in your cab is clean so you won't need to filter it. Now I know you're thinking, "But Gunns, there is no pressure in this system to force the cold air into the intake." Way ahead of you here. What you need to do is get a long section of shop-vac hose and secure one end to the tail pipe with a hose clamp. Run the other end to a hole you will cut in the rear floorboard and secure with gorilla glue and cure as before. Once cured cut a corresponding hole in the floor mat and replace. Now you have created a closed loop system similar to the A/C system in your home so as you drive the pressure from the exhaust will force the cold air from your A/C into your intake and increase your horsepower. As you drive the cold air is recirculated through this system and will just get colder and colder thus making your A/C more efficient! You can thank me later, now go get to work installing this mod!

 

It all makes sense.

 

Bed mats fix everything. Crawl up under it and the warmth it provides will make you feel that all is right with your Tacoma.

 

A true professional wouldn't dream of cobbing it together with Gorilla Glue. Pro's use Flex Seal®. Loser.

 

*runs to office to grab notebook*

 

Make sure you remove it every time you go to the dealership. It will void your warranty!

 

I bought industrial knee pads for work. I work in the office, not in the shop. My knee pads are worn out from all the overtime and bonus action. I'm going to keep at it though, as the person I replaced sucked their way to the top. I'm gonna make it one day.

 

Well don't bump your shins on the dash also

...its Friday at TW

 

I think using the word toxic to describe behavior is as absurd as the other overused word, elegant, when describing an operating system. I just wanted to get that off my chest, and has no relevance to how much I like you and your opinions.

 

EL ABOGADO MALO!!!!!

 

The bad ones get the most $$. I like my lawyers grimey.