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LEO BS Thread

Discussion in 'Law Enforcement Officers' started by KodiakToyTRD, Jun 6, 2012.

  1. Jul 9, 2013 at 6:59 PM
    #2821
    toughtaco

    toughtaco Well-Known Member

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    TRD CAI, MBRP dual exhaust, PIAA headlights and driving lights, 5% limo tint, 3 inch Skyjacker lift , AFE throttle body spacer, 285/70/17 BF Goodright AT TA KO, Grillcraft MX with PIAA's behind the grill, anytime fog light mod, reverse camera anytime mod, and PIAA fog lights on the rear bumper anytime mod light bar behind back window with truck lights for reverse assistance, Optima Red Top Battery, Onza 3x5" LEd reverse lights attached to light bar behind cab
    No they dont give you any ideas other then someone else was chosen. I have went for 3 dogs already. Not a big deal and I will go for the next dog that is for sure!!! I have been working dogs for a while, but soon enough I am just going to end up getting paid for what I do with dogs.....
     
  2. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:09 PM
    #2822
    TnRedNeck721

    TnRedNeck721 GO VOLS!

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    19,083
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    First Name:
    Zach
    TN
    Vehicle:
    07 TRD off road 4WD
    No mud flaps, plasti dipped emblems, and rear bumper, Weather tech digital fit, Bed mat from tractor supply. Pioneer 4400BH head unit. B.A.M.F bed rail tie downs. AVS vent visors.
    :spy:

    How to Tell Where a Cop works:
    Narcotics
    -Immediately grow facial hair, tell everybody you were ordered to.
    -Start wearing "Tap Out" t-shirts
    -Start watching every episode of Monster Garage.
    ... -Buy a biker wallet with a big chain.
    -Practice the "Don't acknowledge me, even while in the police station, look."
    -Thinks even the Chief worships you.
    -Make every case involve overtime $$$.
    -Rates the hotness level of "cranker chicks"
    -Learn to play golf drunk.

    SWAT
    -Wear hut-hut team T-shirts (size small- to accent pecs and biceps), Oakley sunglasses and boots every day.
    -Try to fit the word "breach" and "tactical" in to every conversation. (Ex. "I just breached my pants that was so funny!")
    -Have a mirror handy to check hair, if you have hair.
    -Never say hello to anyone who is not a SWAT operator, just practice your SWAT head nod.
    -Subscribe to Soldier of Fortune, Guns and Ammo and Muscle and Fitness magazines.
    -Learn to play golf wearing a gun, a tactical knife and a back-up gun (just in case)

    Community Service Units
    -Hate SWAT.
    -Work to make everybody love you.
    -Paint your office in pastel colors.
    -Think Feng Shui.
    -Subscribe to Psychology Today.
    -Learn to play miniature golf.

    Traffic units
    -Write tickets to EVERYBODY.
    -Learn to make other cops hate them
    -Spend every weekend cleaning your bike and polishing boots.
    -Annoy the shit out of everyone on the radio by having complete disregard for anyone else's radio traffic.
    -Talk about nothing but how many tickets you wrote in one day.
    -Constantly ride by a building with big windows to chec kout your reflection.
    -Refer to the "other" law enforcement officers as "Car cops."
    -"LBR" (Look Bitchin' Riding) is your mantra. May even have this as a tattoo
    -Golf is lame, motor rodeos are cool.

    K-9 Units
    -Become sadistic.
    -Show pictures of your latest and best dog bite.
    -Brag about your largest drug find.
    -Smell like a dog.
    -Starts to look like your dog
    -Workout 3 times a day.
    -Show off your bruises and bites, even when it is on your ass.

    Administrative Units
    -Three-hour lunches every day, tell everybody it's a "meeting."
    -Upgrade department cell phone every month.
    -Tell everybody you are published in a national law enforcement magazine.
    -Has an awesome pen set
    -Update your revenge list on a weekly basis.
    -Expert at PowerPoint, bar charts and graphs
    -Golf Rules! Play LOTS of golf.

    Patrol Units
    -Has nerves of steel.
    -In a terminal state of nausea from department politics.
    -Inability to keep mouth shut.
    -Has defining tastes in alcohol.
    -The higher the seniority the further back you sit in briefing
    -Is actually respected by peers.
    -Beats the crap out of his caddy on any bogeyed shot.

    FTO
    -Automatically grasps the door handle until knuckles turn white when car is put in gear.
    -Considers a multiple-victim homicide in progress a "good training opportunity" and asks to take primary.
    -Lifelong case of irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)
    -Considers less than three hours of OT to be a quiet day.
    -Buys migraine medicine by the case

    Detectives
    -Come in at 0800.
    -"Breakfast" from 0815 to 1030.
    -Work from 1030 to Noon.
    -Noon to 1400 Work out and Lunch.
    -1400-1700 Sit in CID and talk about how many girlfriends you have and how the wife doesn't know. Plan your next RV, fishing, wine tasting or motorcycle trip.

    Patrol Sergeant
    -Remembers very well "how we usta do it."
    -Always willing to tell his officers the above.
    -Tries to fit the word "liability" in to every sentence.
    -Talks about "what he's hearing from upstairs."

    Trainee
    -Unable to grow facial hair.
    -Watches every episode of Cops.
    -Gets excited when the SWAT guys walk by.
    -Arrives for work three hours early.
    -Thinks the sergeant is thrilled to see him.
    -Won't drink on the golf course because it violates the open container ordinance.

    New Corrections Officers
    - Show up for work 15 minutes early.
    - Buy only the best ink pens (Pilot G-2, not the kind admin types use!).
    - Wear T-Shirts of your "dream department" under your uniform.
    - Wear a full duty belt of gear even though you have to remove everything when you arrive at the facility.
    - Become friends with every local police officer.

    Defensive Tactics Instructors
    -Starts stretching before making arrest.
    -Can spend hours debating the advantages of RCB vs. straight stick.
    -Wears yoga pants off-duty
    -Chuck Norris is GOD
    -Has spent more than $50 on a wood baton.
    -Giggles when a suspect starts to resist.

    Firearms Instructor
    - Responds to every question/statement with the word, 'huh?'
    - Has a % lead/blood level higher than the current Chief's approval rating.
    - Operates under the assumption that the more beer you drink, the more of that lead leaves your system.
    - Thinks a new tactical handgun is a great Christmas gift for the wife/girlfriend.
    - Has an image of a custom 1911-A1 for a screen-saver.
    - Wears the latest high-tech electronic hearing protectors during normal conversation.
     
  3. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:17 PM
    #2823
    ProForce

    ProForce Thin Blue Line

    Joined:
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    Anthony
    SoCal-Ontario
    Vehicle:
    09 MGM TRD Sport DCSB 4.0 Auto 2wd
    Too many to list. See build page. Link in signature
    Hahahahaha! This is probably horrible to admit, but I fit perfectly into "trainee" category lol :anonymous:
     
  4. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:19 PM
    #2824
    TS1980

    TS1980 Glocking Tall

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2011
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    South Florida
    Vehicle:
    2014 Ram 1500 5.7L
    Those are great, gotta love those trainees. I have one riding with me all week...
     
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2013
  5. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:19 PM
    #2825
    TnRedNeck721

    TnRedNeck721 GO VOLS!

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2011
    Member:
    #52731
    Messages:
    19,083
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Zach
    TN
    Vehicle:
    07 TRD off road 4WD
    No mud flaps, plasti dipped emblems, and rear bumper, Weather tech digital fit, Bed mat from tractor supply. Pioneer 4400BH head unit. B.A.M.F bed rail tie downs. AVS vent visors.
    hahaahaha. I saw on cop humor FB page. and I just had to post it, seeing if anyone fit in it.
     
  6. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:24 PM
    #2826
    TS1980

    TS1980 Glocking Tall

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    South Florida
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    2014 Ram 1500 5.7L
    I read the whole list, made me think about a lot of people. Even some I'd like to forget haha.
     
  7. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:26 PM
    #2827
    TnRedNeck721

    TnRedNeck721 GO VOLS!

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2011
    Member:
    #52731
    Messages:
    19,083
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Zach
    TN
    Vehicle:
    07 TRD off road 4WD
    No mud flaps, plasti dipped emblems, and rear bumper, Weather tech digital fit, Bed mat from tractor supply. Pioneer 4400BH head unit. B.A.M.F bed rail tie downs. AVS vent visors.
    Yeah i know a few guys that fit in a few of those categories.
     
  8. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:28 PM
    #2828
    ProForce

    ProForce Thin Blue Line

    Joined:
    Oct 12, 2009
    Member:
    #24205
    Messages:
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    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Anthony
    SoCal-Ontario
    Vehicle:
    09 MGM TRD Sport DCSB 4.0 Auto 2wd
    Too many to list. See build page. Link in signature
    The laughs I get from the Cop Humor page arr the ONLY reason i still have a Facebook. If their page went away so would my account.
     
  9. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:31 PM
    #2829
    TnRedNeck721

    TnRedNeck721 GO VOLS!

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2011
    Member:
    #52731
    Messages:
    19,083
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Zach
    TN
    Vehicle:
    07 TRD off road 4WD
    No mud flaps, plasti dipped emblems, and rear bumper, Weather tech digital fit, Bed mat from tractor supply. Pioneer 4400BH head unit. B.A.M.F bed rail tie downs. AVS vent visors.
    hahaha. I found that page and love it!


    I would not have FB if i did not have so much friends that are family, that live 650 miles a way, and i see like once a year or so even then some times i don’t get to see all of them. I probably have 20 to 25 family members that all live in NY. mostly western NY.

    edit: I keep it so i can see photos of them, and the newer little cousins and stuff. if they all got off FB so would I.
     
  10. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:32 PM
    #2830
    KodiakToyTRD

    KodiakToyTRD [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Male
    CO
    Vehicle:
    2013 Scion FR-S Whiteout
    I kinda fit the patrol unit category

    :anonymous:
     
  11. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:37 PM
    #2831
    Agent Smith

    Agent Smith Always outnumbered, never outgunned

    Joined:
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    05 TRD Offroad Ivan Stewart Edition
    Toytec lift,FJ Anthracite wheels wrapped in BFG A/T 265/75/16's,WAAG Brush Guard, IPF 868's,sleeved fog lights
    Ha, I'm firearms and I always say "huh?" I still wear ears all the time but I know shit still affects my hearing.
     
  12. Jul 9, 2013 at 7:50 PM
    #2832
    ian408

    ian408 Well-Known Member

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    Ian
    Santa Clara, CA
    Vehicle:
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    3" lift, custom rims, snug top shell, shrockworks bumper, warn winch.
    Maybe next time?
     
  13. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:18 PM
    #2833
    Jon4x4

    Jon4x4 I said MEOW!!!

    Joined:
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    Jonathan (Jon)
    Daytona bruh
    Vehicle:
    2005 pink taco
    Billies, toy tec springs and camburg UCAs, and of course the heavy right foot mod
    Less than a month for me til i graduate ble...
     
  14. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:24 PM
    #2834
    KodiakToyTRD

    KodiakToyTRD [OP] Well-Known Member

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    2013 Scion FR-S Whiteout
    Sweet! Got a job lined up? Or were you hired prior to starting?
     
  15. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:24 PM
    #2835
    AzogSS

    AzogSS Well-Known Member

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    Andy
    Soda City, SC
    Vehicle:
    2008 Pick-em-up-truck
    Ultimate Tailgate Machine
    Guess Who's back!?
     
  16. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:26 PM
    #2836
    KodiakToyTRD

    KodiakToyTRD [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Vehicle:
    2013 Scion FR-S Whiteout
    Arnold? :D
     
  17. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:26 PM
    #2837
    teneighty

    teneighty I'd rather be skiing...

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    Right behind you. NY
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCLB SR5 4X4 Nautical Blue
    Check out my Build
    Cool area, great if you have a boat! Not a ton to do there... Lot of dumpy places to stay and they charge you a fortune. I'd travel the extra distance and go to Lake Placid!!
     
  18. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:29 PM
    #2838
    AzogSS

    AzogSS Well-Known Member

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    Soda City, SC
    Vehicle:
    2008 Pick-em-up-truck
    Ultimate Tailgate Machine
    Nope. This guy. Just got my badge and credentials back today. Now with same dept. as Tigerfan00! :woot:
     
  19. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:29 PM
    #2839
    KodiakToyTRD

    KodiakToyTRD [OP] Well-Known Member

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    Sweet! Good to hear!
     
  20. Jul 9, 2013 at 8:37 PM
    #2840
    Jon4x4

    Jon4x4 I said MEOW!!!

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    First Name:
    Jonathan (Jon)
    Daytona bruh
    Vehicle:
    2005 pink taco
    Billies, toy tec springs and camburg UCAs, and of course the heavy right foot mod

    Going through the hiring process with Deland PD right now, just printed out a few more apps. Flagler County SO, LEE County SO, Oviedo PD, Mount dora PD. I'm applying anywhere and everywhere haha
     
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