Quote of the Day

"Shake dem boobies like a bowl of jello...... but not the kind with fruit in it, i dont like fruit in my jello."
-Me, last weekend when I was drunk at the pool

 

I'd like to see Richard Burton or Sir John Gielgud or Sir Laurence Olivier do "Macbeth", memorizing all that dialogue, and have a boner.
- Ron Jeremy

 

haha! i love that one

 

A heart, a heart that hurts, is a heart, a heart that works. - Juliana Hatfield‎

 

"Critics are to authors what dogs are to lamp-posts." - Jeffrey Robinson.

 

"The constitution of the United States is not a document that limits the rights of man, but a document that limits the power of society over man."

 

"Wise men wrote the Constitution, but clever judges have been destroying it, bit by bit, turning it into an instrument of arbitrary judicial power, instead of a limitation on all government power." - Thomas Sowell

 

There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be President. – Kurt Vonnegut

 

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America? - Unknown

 

"I have the ability to make a lot of people who are normally really suppressed, especially sexual, women who are just really really, like they were raised for instance really strict, like sex is naughty, sex is nasty, and yet you put thirty women in a room with me and an hour later they're all talking to me about their masturbation stories and how they love it in the ass or something like that."
-Keri Windsor, on her skill at speaking her mind and putting others at ease

 

Romantic? Hemingway? He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who squandered half of his life hanging around Picasso trying to nail his leftovers. - Kat Stratford

 

Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway
Nobody living can make me turn back
This land is made for you and me.
- Woody Guthrie

 

No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens. - Abraham Lincoln

 

Thank you for "coming out"! - Idaho Senator, Larry Craig, to audience.

 

"Maybe this world is another planet's Hell." - Aldous Huxley

 

"I am mindful of the difference between the executive branch and the legislative branch. I assured all four of these leaders that I know the difference, and that difference is they pass the laws and I execute them." - George W. Bush

 

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. - Martin Luther King Jr., Letter from Birmingham Jail

 

Be silent as to services you have rendered, but speak of favours you have received. - Seneca

 

"Prosperity is a way of living and thinking, and not just money or things. Poverty is a way of living and thinking, and not just a lack of money or things." - Eric Butterworth

 

"Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps." - Emo Phillips