Roast my Tacoma! (2nd gen edition)

The only missing link here is the missing overload that's making your truck sag like 97 year old smoker's tits.

 

That would be correct sir! Deleted the overload when we swapped in the Icon 3 Leaf AAL.

 

Yes, snorkel is just to get street cred. Gobi rack and roof top tent incoming.

Craigslist ad says "never seen the trails, all highway miles"

 

Hey at least all of my stickers are tastefully done, put on straight, and have meaning.

 

How straight? I did college/grad school/residency in SF.

 

We get it you discovered "Amazon.com" and get a new accessory every 2-3 pay periods. Nothing like Chinese recycled plastic "accessories" that make your truck "look aggressive" for poser trips around the back part of the dump or in front of the one gate at Wilderness Park that looks like a trailhead. Those skid plates are great, when you drive through DTLA no garbage will get caught in your undercarriage, and the muck won't splash up as bad when you get your poser shots under the 6th Street Viaduct. Only one shackle, nice haas but no winch, and you put the license plate onto the skid - how often do you joke about how you've "gotta be legal, bro" though nobody uses that as PC for a stop during the commute hours which are about the only ones your truck's on the road.

Cute dog, must be your ice breaker as no LA girl would ever ask about your truck even if it's "kinda outdoorsy and cute I guess". Glad you got the 31x12.50's since it's a desert out there, but Glamis and Pismo are 4 hours each way if you're lucky and you don't have anywhere to park a 16' travel trailer with your one car garage and South Pasadena parking regs.

The telltale sign here is the lack of wheel well protection - we know you don't drive away from pavement cause you'd have posts complaining about the rock noise and buildup of mud. Truck's as fake as a guy who want's to chat but finds out you're not "verified" and is going to do coke in the bathroom with someone who is.

Hand in your keys and grab a sedan on the way home, the universe will reward you with an HOV lane sticker.

ETA: You mean don't insult the dog who won't even look at you as you pose? I'd give that pup a rack of beef ribs just for riding around in that rig.

 

And I thought I was brutal

 

I think from here on out every new west coast bro rig that gets posted here we'll simply just link to Taco 422's "SoCal in a nutshell" post.

 

Supported

 

Great GF pic, you captured her in the moment she regretted telling the guy from Newport "I'm going out with my BF tomorrow :-X". Guess he hadn't yet guilt tripped her into dumping you and moving up in the world.

Why bother when she's likely still waiting for you to realize the sand in Riverside County isn't anything like the beach, as she's not pleasantly laying in the sun enjoying life, she's waiting for you to realize playing her favorite playlist isn't as awesome as the day she'd planned doing nothing in the truest sense of the term.

I like the plate that's permanently affixed but not visible from the front or sides of the vehicle, it's a nice compliment to the non DOT taillights supplemented with work lights you scored off a tow truck from a friend's work. Those tail lights come off an impound? Where'd you get the "pay attention to the fact I spent money and have one too" lightbar in your grill?

Is your hood broken or are you just too desperate to have "that stock look" without having the cahones (or cash) to convert to a more pre-runner "bumper"? If you're so set on keeping "that stock look" where's your under headlight plastic panels?

I like how you wheel on hard pack, and pose on hard pack as well. The Michellin's would do you well on the roads and the hardpack yet you got not your daddy's BFG's, you got the KO2's!

If the girl's down with Sea King's, have her hit me up.

 

Dang, this one was good.
I’m surprised you didn’t comment on the missing fog lights and street boi drift stitch from when I stuffed it in Pismo beach


You’ll be happy to know I have since switched to some nice tires better suited to the trails i hit most often (the freeway system in SoCal)

 

Those tires look a lot like the Bridgestone AT 695s I had a while back, great tire on and off road. Got the idea from all of the USFS rides.

If you're interested, there's a CB antenna that's almost the same as the tall antenna on the CHP cars, it works super well, and people tend to leave you alone when there's antennae without cables showing. I'll help you put one in anytime. That type of slip and crash is super common on the beach, at least that bowl looks like you could drive out of it. Sorry about crashing into sand tho, it's crazy how much stuff you can break on the beach.

I used to spend some time in these rigs - could have helped lol.

 

What a beautiful dog. The pile it plopped behind it is huge.

 

Your truck's front body panel lines & gaps fit about as well as clothes from TJ Maxx.

• Yamaha, Fox, and "racing number" 111 stickers in the rear window...CHECK
• Tonneau cover...CHECK
• Hot girlfriend...CHECK

...you must be a quad rider

 

Dang, I luckily never had to see one of those paramedics up close. Those look rad nevertheless.

Sheeesh, I get that’s it’s a roasting BS thread, but quads?!? I wouldn’t wish one on my worst enemy


You’re right though, the only “race“ I’ve done in recent years is the 2 stroke national at Glen Helen…

 

Nice try, but we know that's not really you on the 111 bike in that photo. Nope, you're that squid in the background boner airing his bike while simultaneously trying to dry hump its gas cap. Alright, enough ball busting. Cheers to a fellow moto bro.

To each their own, but to me racing is the black hole of money & time. These days I'd much rather pursue being a "professional" practice & play rider.

 

Alright, enough dishing it out for me, let me have it boys.

 

I can confirm you can go at least 2 miles after throwing the ass of a chevy through the radiator without cooking the engine.

this was a $1300 truck, some of my stickers have meaning, others are just the brands i've tested and liked. My eyecrometer does work less when i am consuming the alcohols.

 

Those were going to be my top three mods: A rubber duck, yellow christmass tree air freshener and a chrome bull bar.

 

Let me guess, you were testing out the filtration properties of your new "cold air intake".