Slightly Over 40 and 50s Thread. Please Refrain From My Lawn, I’m Having A Midlife Crisis

Ok, rules apply-
From the original thread;
Talk about whatever. All subjects open for discussion.
You young punks.....GTFO!!

Everyone joining this thread will be asked vigorously about hummingbirds.
Be prepared.

Update;
Share your knowledge, little known facts, or hummingbird stories.

Keep the politics out. We self police in this thread just as we did in the original. Trolls will be ignored, there are plenty of dumpster fires out there for you to join in. Go there if you feel the need to internet flex.

 

Boy, sure do hope this thread is as f*cking awesome as the last one.

 

Test my bird knowledge. I dare you.

 

Meh, your presence is mediocre at best anyhow.

 

Hummingbirds are useless as spies. No matter how good the microphones and how small the cameras, all you see is gray flapping and all you hear is wwhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

 

What do hummingbirds taste like?

 

Cheetos.

 

If you were having a midlife crises there would be a corvette, 911 or a new lawn tractor being discussed. The biggest excitement in life would be two for one on Tuesdays at Ruby Tuesdays because your favorite waitress works there, her name is Kristie or Megan or some other basic girl name. Now about twice a month you go to Great Clips to get your hair made fresh, you jokingly ask for the haircut that says you're running for office, office of an HOA that is. You like it when Megan brushes against you it's the most affection you've seen outside the dog licking your salty calves after mowing the lawn. It's almost the season, Scotts yard well fuck that, you send out for a soil analysis so you know exactly what the soil needs. Soon putting stripe patterns in the lawn will be your meditation.

 

Well the new 2020 Corvettes are not available, a Porsche can not handle our roads, and my mower is only 1 yr old.

 

...

...shit.

Okay, let’s break this down.

there would be a corvette, 911 or a new lawn tractor being discussed. Heading to HD to get an E-GO mower and trimmer because my yard guy took a new job and can’t do my yard anymore.

The biggest excitement in life would be two for one on Tuesdays at Ruby Tuesdays because your favorite waitress works there, her name is Kristie or Megan or some other basic girl name. Fuck that noise. We go to Valentina’s, and her name is brisket.

Now about twice a month you go to Great Clips to get your hair made fresh Guilty, but 3 weeks to a month. I’m cheap.

you jokingly ask for the haircut that says you're running for office, office of an HOA that is. Guilty, HOA president because no one else wants to do it.

You like it when Megan brushes against you it's the most affection you've seen outside the dog licking your salty calves after mowing the lawn. I’m old enough to be her dad. It’s creepy. Seriously, I’m here for the brisket.

It's almost the season, Scotts yard well fuck that. Hey now, the Scott’s stuff works great on coastal bermuda.

you send out for a soil analysis so you know exactly what the soil needs. But we’re considering going zoysia.

Soon putting stripe patterns in the lawn will be your meditation. Fuck yes.

 

Will be filling the hummingbird feeders tomorrow. I’ve been hauling dirt around my yard all day with my lawn tractor, making raised bed gardens.

 

Too many rules, I'm out. I can't live like this! I'm going to my room! (Slams door).

 

Haha.
I just put out a trailer load of cypress mulch today. My back is killing me. Damn I’m getting old.

 

Will be doing that this spring. Had concrete garden curbs put in last fall. Will be filling them with mulch.

For @Itchyfeet - it’s a John Deere btw

 

You can’t beat the green ones. Zero turn?

 

No sir, D130. Didn’t need much more then that...

Older version of this;

https://www.lowes.com/pd/John-Deere...ing-Capability-Kit-Sold-Separately/1000368407

 

True, but