1. Welcome to Tacoma World!

    You are currently viewing as a guest! To get full-access, you need to register for a FREE account.

    As a registered member, you’ll be able to:
    • Participate in all Tacoma discussion topics
    • Communicate privately with other Tacoma owners from around the world
    • Post your own photos in our Members Gallery
    • Access all special features of the site

Sobriety.... One year later... Please Read.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by RearViewMirror, Oct 2, 2013.

  1. Jun 13, 2018 at 8:27 AM
    #341
    krap22

    krap22 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2011
    Member:
    #53389
    Messages:
    21,161
    i'm having a hard time wrapping my head around the suicides that are happening. I know i'll never know the demons that someone is dealing with. It still struggle to figure out what my step-son thought was so bad that he's done the things he's done. I fear we will see a huge spike in suicides because of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade. I wish people didn't see that as a way out, but now that it's been publicized more people will opt for it. I don't know of a fix, but i do know there are too many assholes and not enough friends in this world right now.
     
    NunyaBizness likes this.
  2. Jun 13, 2018 at 1:49 PM
    #342
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
    I agree man. I just don't understand it? After Chris Cornell died last year his close friend Chester Bennington of Linkin Park committed suicide on what would have been Chris Cornell's 53rd birthday. I have a hard time believing that people do this because another person does it and it becomes a trend? But... I could be wrong.

    The thing is... We never know what is going on in someone's personal life or what demons lie in wait in their head. As bad as it got when I was going through all my stuff the thought of suicide never crossed my mind and I was in the darkest place I think you can go with depression and alcoholism. But each person handles their personal demons in other self destructive ways. Even at my worst time I knew if I just stopped I would gain some perspective of how I ended up at the bottom of that pit. I knew it would be a very long climb out but even if I lost everything (which I should have) there was still life to be lived. And eventually I would find happiness once again.

    Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death nationwide and the 2nd leading cause of death for people in their teens and twenties. The stigma behind mental health issues needs to be done away with and people need to understand that it is a real problem. When someone has cancer there is ample treatment but when it comes to mental health issues the infrastructure just isn't there. A large part of the problem lies with the person suffering and they are either unwilling or they are unable to understand that they have an issue that needs to be treated.

    I don't have any answers to these issues. It just breaks my heart that someone takes their own life. I wish the trend would stop.
     
  3. Jun 13, 2018 at 2:01 PM
    #343
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
  4. Jun 13, 2018 at 2:19 PM
    #344
    16Tacos

    16Tacos Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2015
    Member:
    #146382
    Messages:
    760
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Zach
    Boston
    Vehicle:
    08 Access Cab 4x4 V6 SR5
    OME Nitrochargers w/886s & Dakars, ARB Deluxe Bull Bar w/Warn winch, RCI sliders with kick out, IFS & Mid skids, BFF Hi-clearance rear bumper, Brushed Copper 17" SCS Ray10s w/285-70 KO2s, Black OEM 16" steelies w/255-85 KM2s, Leer contractor cap w/Smittybilt overlander xl RTT, Off-Grid Engineering dual battery kit and bed power panel, Blue sea aux fuse block, Wyntner 60L fridge freezer, ARB dual compressor, Pioneer 720BT head unit, CB radio, @Matt_Gecko bed and engine bay lights, @TacomaTruckParts Dirt bike tie down bar, color matched OEM grill, A-Pillar phone mount mod, @Docloco rear seat molle panel
    Thank you for sharing. I've been trying to help my neighbor who has been struggling with addiction for a long time now but like you said I believe he needs to want to get sober before he can make any lasting changes. I just try to support him and help him out when I can.
     
  5. Jun 13, 2018 at 4:58 PM
    #345
    IPNPULZ

    IPNPULZ Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2014
    Member:
    #132087
    Messages:
    8,953
    Gender:
    Male
    Somewhere in time.....
    Vehicle:
    2019 TRD ORP 4 Runner
    going to be fun!
    There truly is no clear picture to that evil side of thoughts or actions that takes ones life my Uncle several years ago put a gun to his head without any warning signs.....

    Thank you for sharing those troubling times with others to maybe help stop what could be the end....
     
  6. Jun 13, 2018 at 5:06 PM
    #346
    chasingtails

    chasingtails Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2018
    Member:
    #255324
    Messages:
    89
    Gender:
    Male
    Vehicle:
    2018 TRD Sport 4x4
    Like y’all, these suicides have weighed heavy on my mind as of late. Though I’ve been in the rooms for over a decade now and haven’t felt that despair since I came in, I can still remember it like it was yesterday.

    I think this is partly why I liked Bourdain so much. He was fucking real. And it’s really damn sad
     
  7. Jun 13, 2018 at 6:24 PM
    #347
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
    Unfortunately your right. There is no way to make someone to stop whatever is truly addicting to them until they either:

    1: Want to make the change for themselves because they recognize they have an issue or...

    2: The change will be made for them. They will hit rock bottom with nowhere else to go. Sadly I chose the latter but it forced me to take action and right my ship.

    My only advice is don't be an enabler.

    I agree... There is just no way of knowing what is going on in someones life unless they tell you. The happiest person that looks like they have it all together may actually be the saddest person at any given time. When I was going through all my stuff I always handled everything with humor even though I was dying on the inside.

    I loved watching Anthony Bourdain all the way back to No Reservations and I'll miss his straight talk but also his willingness to be open to everyone. The sad thing is though, there are thousands that do the same thing each day.
     
  8. Jun 13, 2018 at 6:30 PM
    #348
    chasingtails

    chasingtails Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2018
    Member:
    #255324
    Messages:
    89
    Gender:
    Male
    Vehicle:
    2018 TRD Sport 4x4
    @RearViewMirror Of that there is absolutely no doubt. Unfortunately, I’ve known more than a few. Even more unfortunately, it takes celebrities offing themselves to get society to notice and think twice about these issues.
     
  9. Jun 13, 2018 at 6:30 PM
    #349
    anthony250f

    anthony250f Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2012
    Member:
    #73066
    Messages:
    15,215
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Anthony
    San Diego, CA
    Vehicle:
    2008 dcsb trd offroad 4wd
    Just the other day I was driving on the freeway and someone jumped off the overpass just before I drove through. Police had just gotten there not long before I was coming through. I saw the body laying in the freeway with blood all over. I will never forget the image in my head. Chilling for sure. I’m hopefully going into law enforcement in the next year.
     
  10. Jun 13, 2018 at 6:31 PM
    #350
    chasingtails

    chasingtails Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2018
    Member:
    #255324
    Messages:
    89
    Gender:
    Male
    Vehicle:
    2018 TRD Sport 4x4
    Woof man that’s heavy stuff.
     
  11. Jun 13, 2018 at 6:43 PM
    #351
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
    It's sad but I think you are correct. One of my best friends on the FD committed suicide on Dec 24 2011 with an overdose. He was struggling with the same issues as I was at the time. He just took it one step further than I did. I miss him everyday. I've still got his voicemail he left me the night before recorded on my computer telling me "I was like a brother to him". The next day he was gone.

    Good luck with your choice of career. You will have to see and do things that you never thought you would. There will be some things that you can't comprehend that one person could do to another. You will see the worst of humanity. I have nothing but respect for those that are willing to go down that path. It took a toll on me and the things that I've seen, heard, smelled, picking up body parts, treating gunshot wounds, to horrific traffic accidents to name a few and they will be with me forever.
     
  12. Jul 23, 2018 at 6:46 PM
    #352
    NunyaBizness

    NunyaBizness President of the jberry813 fan club

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2018
    Member:
    #258649
    Messages:
    9,869
    Gender:
    Male
    A very humbling story. I am glad that you found strength in order to overcome that problem. I am coming up on 2 yrs clean soon. It has been hard work but it is definitely worth the effort. My addiction was pain medications after breaking my back. Had been on opiates at a high dose for 2 yrs, and finally hit rock bottom. I am very lucky also for not dying during that dependency. As are you. I hope that the years following this post have been good and life has treated you well.
    Cheers from Idaho.
     
  13. Jul 23, 2018 at 7:37 PM
    #353
    HomerTaco

    HomerTaco TOYWERX Vendor

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2010
    Member:
    #34129
    Messages:
    40,835
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig
    Bucks County Pa.
    Vehicle:
    four sticks, dual cases, zero fucks...
    Core-Hurst short throw shifter & T-handle / Carbon Fiber Interior / custom console light / De-badged / leather interior / Heated Front seats / Red Line Hood Struts / Painted speaker grills /one-off TRD Satoshi Grill with 12-15 front-end swap/ Pioneer AVIC-X920BT HU / Scangauge II / Black LED Tails / Dash Mount for iPad mini / Safari Snorkel / Auto-pilot mode / Leer 100XQ Cap / 4x Innovations sliders / Rear Diff Breather Mod / front windows tinted to 35% / Brute Force Fab Hybrid Front Bumper / BAMF Rear Diff Skid / Budbuilt Skids / CBI Trail Master 2.0 rear hybrid bumper / Fox rr coils/ TC UCA's/ TC spindle gussets/ TC Cam Tab gussets / Dakar leafs / Defined Engineering shackles / All pro U bolt flip / Timbren Rear Bumpstops / BAMF LCA skids / Exhaust re-route / Fog Light anytime Mod / LowRange Off Road extended rear brake lines / ATO Shackle Flip / sectioned Bushwhacker flares / re-geared to 4.56 / ARB Front & Rear Locking Diff / ARB CKMA12 compressor / PrInSu full rack system / 1" body lift / Inchworm 4.7 crawlbox / twin stick FJ t-case / Davez off-road triple-stick kit/
    Congrats on your upcoming anniversary!
     
    NunyaBizness likes this.
  14. Jul 24, 2018 at 8:29 AM
    #354
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
    Congrats on 2 years my friend. I was addicted to pain pills for over 10 years. And if I'm honest that is the one thing that I miss. I don't miss the alcohol at all but I do miss the pain pills. But when I started mixing them together... well... you can imagine the outcome. It wasn't pretty. I came very close to overdosing that night and I also came very close to making my daughter an orphan and possibly impacting other innocent people because of my actions. That was my rock bottom and after I found out what I did it scared the living shit out of me. Fear of what I "could" have done was a great motivating factor to me. Help from my family helped me when I couldn't or wouldn't help myself.
     
    IPNPULZ, NunyaBizness and HomerTaco like this.
  15. Jul 24, 2018 at 9:52 AM
    #355
    NunyaBizness

    NunyaBizness President of the jberry813 fan club

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2018
    Member:
    #258649
    Messages:
    9,869
    Gender:
    Male

    Very true. I have days when I think about pain meds... and think about crushing them up and putting it up my nose like an idiot. But like you I have a great motivator to stay clean. Two kids, a great job, and good friends. Another thing that keeps me off of them is the feeling of pride that I was able to get off them, cold turkey, from a daily dose of 140mg-200mgs a day. The feelings of w/ds are not something that I would wish on my worst enemy. And I dont want to go through that ever again.

    Thanks for the reply. Always good to hear from someone that understands what its like.
     
    RearViewMirror [OP] likes this.
  16. Jul 24, 2018 at 10:10 AM
    #356
    NunyaBizness

    NunyaBizness President of the jberry813 fan club

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2018
    Member:
    #258649
    Messages:
    9,869
    Gender:
    Male
    Having been very close to doing so myself I can understand why someone can feel like there is no way out of their personal struggles. I say I understand it, but I do not condone it. It is hard to understand from the outside, but when you are in that moment... the one where you're so depressed and feel trapped, and also feel like noone would care if you were gone, or even feel like a burden to the ones around you, in the moment of despair your mentality is not based on reality... just your distorted reality in those moments. Even when it looks like they are happy, and you feel like they know they are cared about, you have to understand that the mental state is not about selfishness as I have heard others say it is about hopelessness and loss of ones self. Noone really wants to kill themselves... we all have a sense of self preservation, however it can feel like there is no other option, you literally feel like you're doing the world a favor. Even when you're not. Its a very distorted view of ones self when you are in the depths of the mental illness of deep depression.

    I hope that made sense. Again I do not agree with suicide... just that I do understand it. When someone makes it past a place like that they realize they are stronger than they thought, and every struggle in life makes us stronger. And becomes a part of us.
    Its hard to explain that, or help someone who is suicidal by conveying the feelings of the lights at the end of the tunnel when they are blinded by depression. But there is always a way out. And a happy life.

    Sorry so long. Hope it was not too lost in context.

    Cheers
     
  17. Jul 24, 2018 at 10:42 AM
    #357
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
    I 100% agree with your assessment. The strange thing is even as depressed as I was the thought of suicide never crossed my mind. I just didn't know how to get myself out of the state that I was in. It took me hitting rock bottom to start the long climb back out. I don't know why it never crossed my mind? But I think what you posted is about as accurate a description of what goes on in someones mind when something like that happens. It's sad because there is always a way out but sometimes they just can't see it.
     
    NunyaBizness likes this.
  18. Jul 24, 2018 at 11:57 AM
    #358
    HomerTaco

    HomerTaco TOYWERX Vendor

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2010
    Member:
    #34129
    Messages:
    40,835
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig
    Bucks County Pa.
    Vehicle:
    four sticks, dual cases, zero fucks...
    Core-Hurst short throw shifter & T-handle / Carbon Fiber Interior / custom console light / De-badged / leather interior / Heated Front seats / Red Line Hood Struts / Painted speaker grills /one-off TRD Satoshi Grill with 12-15 front-end swap/ Pioneer AVIC-X920BT HU / Scangauge II / Black LED Tails / Dash Mount for iPad mini / Safari Snorkel / Auto-pilot mode / Leer 100XQ Cap / 4x Innovations sliders / Rear Diff Breather Mod / front windows tinted to 35% / Brute Force Fab Hybrid Front Bumper / BAMF Rear Diff Skid / Budbuilt Skids / CBI Trail Master 2.0 rear hybrid bumper / Fox rr coils/ TC UCA's/ TC spindle gussets/ TC Cam Tab gussets / Dakar leafs / Defined Engineering shackles / All pro U bolt flip / Timbren Rear Bumpstops / BAMF LCA skids / Exhaust re-route / Fog Light anytime Mod / LowRange Off Road extended rear brake lines / ATO Shackle Flip / sectioned Bushwhacker flares / re-geared to 4.56 / ARB Front & Rear Locking Diff / ARB CKMA12 compressor / PrInSu full rack system / 1" body lift / Inchworm 4.7 crawlbox / twin stick FJ t-case / Davez off-road triple-stick kit/
    Agree with Britt - that was spot-on.
     
  19. Jul 24, 2018 at 7:36 PM
    #359
    NunyaBizness

    NunyaBizness President of the jberry813 fan club

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2018
    Member:
    #258649
    Messages:
    9,869
    Gender:
    Male
    Its the sad truth, hindsight is 20/20 and when you make it through deep depression you can see that it gets better... its just so hard to see from the harsh "present" that you are in during the twisted world of depression. There are always good days and bad, no matter what... but the bad days give purpose and a sense of contrast to appreciate the good.

    Again I thank you for your response!
     
  20. Jul 24, 2018 at 9:54 PM
    #360
    RearViewMirror

    RearViewMirror [OP] Saw things so much clearer once you... were in my

    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2013
    Member:
    #102010
    Messages:
    22,570
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Craig Christ
    State of Love and Trust
    Vehicle:
    2013 DCSB 4X4 TRD Off Road *Sold*
    That's almost exactly what I tell my 13 year old daughter. "If you didn't have a bad day you would never know what a good day felt like".
     
    NunyaBizness likes this.

Products Discussed in

To Top