Stay on Topic

Thanks bro! Off work in 45 minutes! Will see what happens when I get home. Trying to talk her into letting me post her "French Maid" pics on the GF/wife thread.... heh Hell, if she wants a divorce it ain't gonna matter. No nudity so I don't see what the problem is. I got her saying she'll dig it out for me too... I'm hoping once the flue/cold/alergy thing she has passes we can just fuck and get all this emotional crap out of our systems. It's f'n draining man! And doesn't seem to resolve anything either as she waffles back n forth about staying or going.

 

Women - can't live with 'em, can't run 'em over with your Taco.

 

Just need to lift it and reinforce the skid plates and bumper!

 

LMAO!

 

Probably better if you don't anyway--not while trying to work on your relationship. Partly she may want you to because she feels guilty and thinks that would make things "even" between you--not necessarily that it would or wouldn't, but that may be what she thinks.

The connection thing can be remedied, but it takes work and alot of it, and pets and kids and bills make it far more difficult. At least she is being honest, so that gives you guys a place to start. I can see the feeling trapped, I guess, but that's also life and there's nothing to do but deal with it. It's possible that this is all just a product of being overwhelmed and that running away just seems easier, but in the end there would be a huge amount of loss too once the fun wears off--that might be something to remind her of in the nicest possible way. As for whether it could happen again, well, it might, or it might not if you two really make the commitment to work on things. If either of you have doubts about this, it won't work well though because it's gonna take a massive amount of work to put things back together and it won't be pretty sometimes. Just tell me to shut up if you don't want me yammering on--I won't be offended!

 

No, it's cool! Some good advice there. And that's what we've been doing a lot of: talking, and just letting it all out. No more hiding. Not after I read her IM logs and found out I was right about her cheating on me. I asked her point blank if she slept with him, and she admitted it. She thought I outsmarted her at first and just assumed she had until she fell for it and admitted. I suppose I could have done that, but I read it in a log of a chat between her and him so I knew before asking if there was anything else she wanted to tell me.... She said no, I pried a little more, she asks what I'm getting at, and I just threw it out there. I wasn't mad or upset about it. I know I've had thoughts about that (and so do most of you on here.... ), but i never followed through on them. But it's still kinda weird how calm I was about the whole thing. I thought maybe that'd help her knowing I wasn't mad at her, but now me NOT being upset (and maybe a little curious about what happened) makes her feel awkward toward me.... Never mind it wasn't awkward when she got back monday night... Guess I don't understand that....

Oh and she doesn't feel guilty about cheating..... Whatever that does to the equation....

 

Sounds like you did well on the whole letting her know you knew thing. I guess the only way to figure out how the whole you not being mad and her not feeling guilty things fits together is to understand why you aren't mad and she doesn't feel guilty. That's something that needs to be discussed between you two so that there aren't any assumptions made or conclusions jumped to on either of your parts. Talking is the best medicine at this point, so you guys are doing the best thing possible right now.

 

Hey pt, that's a pretty shitty situation to be in. I'm sorry to hear it. I can relate up until the the bisexual cheating during a poorly timed trip to FL wife part. I find it odd that you aren't angry and she's not guilty. I guess everyone handles these things differently. I hope things work out for you.

 

Yeah... I dunno... She has a strong attraction to him, and her to him. Can't say what I would've done in the same situation. I've thought about it before, but (in my experience....again.... ) the significant other ALWAYS finds out... I mean, you have to make arrangements somehow either through IM, email, myspace, facebook, phone or physical contact. All the online options can leave traces or logs someone else can find (or keystroke log). If a man calls for a woman, a man answers, and gets hung up on (or vice versa) there's a clue something is up. And each cell bill as ALL incoming/outgoing calls made listed. Anyway, with a house, 3 kids, and just a good family in general I'd never risk cheating. It would be like comitting suicide IMO. Lose everything I have over what, a couple hours or less of fun? So I kinda understand her actions. Things have been kinda strained between us for the last couple years between losing a job, out of work for 6 months, not getting unemployment for 2 months, got a dead end job, barely keeping the house.... Now I finally have a job that pays more, better hours, better benefits, direct deposit, no worries about bounced paychecks..... It's like there's finally a light at the end of the tunnel and things will work out.... HA Now this. I've made damn near a complete change in my attitude and view on life, but it might be too late for her.

Bisexual? huh? I was just talking about maybe getting another women involved so we can both have something different.... (She used to date women, but claims she's not interested in that anymore.... )

Again, I may have done the same so I guess I don't have any right to be mad at her. The fact I'm curious about details does kinda concern me though.... Maybe I'm more fucked up than I thought. Her not feeling guilty.... eh.... Probably due to stress over the last couple of years that kinda pushed us apart, and they've always been attracted to each other. Not enough to want a relationship though.


Meh.... I think we should just fuck, make up, and move on... lol Too much thinking, too much confusion, and things are getting better so she can always rethink it in a couple months if things aren't better. But she's miserable with this cold and obviously isn't in the mood for much of anything. Also makes it hard to figure out how she really feels since no one is happy or in a good mood coughing, hacking, and sneezing all day.

 

Good point! If she leaves then I finally get my dual monitor desktop back! A 19"WS and 17" instead of a crappy 14" laptop.

 

PT i wish you the best in your situation, its not easy going through something like that hang in there bro.

 

Thanks man. I appreciate it. Maybe things will work out.... lol

 

I hope so man nothing better than family i dont know what i would do if i had a split my family means alot to me!

 

And that's the big thing... Keep the family together and try to work things out or walk away and do our own thing. She wants to walk away and be by herself with no responsibilities ideally, but that ain't gonna happen. I'm trying to figure out if she's burned the hell out (understandable, no honeymoon or vacations in 3 years.... just work work work), having a mid-life crisis, or really is that irresponsible and it took this long to surface again. She gave her first daughter to her mother shortly after having her because she "couldn't handle it". Part of me wonders if this is a pattern.....

 

I passed my Microsoft 70-620 Exam! 2 down 2 to go!

 

Whoo hoo! I need to start working on some of those. I have my A+, but honestly think it's worthless. But my employer at the time was paying for it so......

 

Wow well hopefully she sees that its not a passing game and that there is more on hand then just being free.

 

whoah... looks like i need to do some advise swappin with PT ive been gone too long... and once again.... im out to arkansas so it will have to wait

 

I retired from the National Guard 5 1/2 years ago and I'm finally going to go get my red ID card... Bucause it's going to save me 50% on Cirque de Soleil tickets in Vegas .