The Useless Posts Thread

I wanted one of these real bad.

 

Went food shopping. Paid bills. Made dinner. Sat on my ass surfing TW. Put kid in bed. Time for....?????

 

Tomorrow is pirate day at preschool. Why do I tell you this you ask? Because its the useless posts thread, and this is where all useless information goes unless it is an informational post at TW and it has been hijacked. But I digress. Because it is pirate day at preschool tomorrow, the four-year-old needs to dress like a pirate (naturally), and, thus, tonight I needed to run around for 60+ minutes assembling said pirate costume because I forgot that tomorrow was pirate day at preschool. . I found several bandanas no problem. The plastic sword took about 20 minutes because the eleven-year-old could not remember where his plastic pirate sword is. I ransacked the garage/shithole to no avail, but I did find another rather dirty plastic sword that would suffice. I washed the sword and proceeded to dig around in the eleven-year-olds room for a belt to hold the sword (with the four-year-old dutifully following me to "help" . In the process of finding the belt (red) I also found a small plastic dagger that the child also wished to carry in the aforementioned belt. I afixed the belt, the bandana, and the swords to the child and sent him downstairs to show his father and brother. His father said "what about the eyepatch" Eyepatch? We have an eyepatch? Oh yes, said his father, I think its "upstairs". So off we go, the child and I to ransack three toyboxes and a drawer. We then go back downstairs to ransack another toybox. His father, noticing my frustration (it may have been the mumbled curses that tipped him off) finally gets up and goes upstairs. We follow. He goes straight to the top drawer of the eleven-year-olds drawer and pulls out said eyepatch. (Yes, he is momentarily still alive.) I attach the eyepatch to the child. He is happy that he looks like a pirate. I disassemble the pirate costume go to put it all in his bookbag. At the bottom of the (black) bookbag, I find a small (black) eyepatch. At this point, it is an hour past his bedtime, and I have begun to twitch. I look at the four-year-old who has been following me around the house for the entire hour and say, "You have an eyepatch in your bookbag!" He says, "I know."

Welcome to my nightmare.

 

That is too funny Charli! You gotta feel like I do...if it weren't for the human continuance of the species thing built into parents, sometimes......

 

friggin patching holes in the walls and taping up shit that dont need to get painted.....................while the wfey has girls night!! thats ok tho..........she needs one every once in a while for putting up with me!



i hate painting!!!!!!!!

 

You got that right!

The sad part is, Hubby and the eleven-year-old, who were sitting on their butts playing video games the whole time, think that this whole thing is just hilarious. There. Will. Be. Trouble!

 

Ooh ooh. I see a couple of empty plates, an unopened can of tuna and a can opener on the dinner table tomorrow night!

 

Hopefully you have a better day tomorrow. Typical male behavior

 

damn Charli..................sounds like you need tequila......badly!!!

 

Maybe not you Lucy, but the majority do exactly what Charli said

 

im guilty of said treason once in a while. i'll admit it...................or the wife will admit it for me.

 

Eh I do it to, so my girlfriend says. But honestly it's not deliberate! Sometimes I'm just not paying attention to when she's getting stressed...and sometimes I'm just smart enough not to try to help when she's getting stressed!

Hmm...maybe sometimes it IS deliberate...

But then, she gets a serious kick watching my ears get red when I can't find the remote control. Thinks it's hilarious. Then when I finally find it she'll say something like "now was that worth getting that mad about?". To which of course I say nothing. Being nearly 50 I did manage to learn when to keep my trap shut. Sometimes.

 

hey hey\

 

couldnt have said it better myself........................word for word....except the 50 part. im almost 30.

 

whats happening brotha??

 

nothin just droppin by before bed long day tomorrow. my little girl has a doctors appointment with the crippled childrens league to see what's the matter with her leg

 

Hmmmmm...good idea. Hubby hates tuna.

Typical, yup!

Tequila would be good. But I'm going to have to settle for eventually going to bed. I have no tequila.