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To: God , From:The Dog.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by chris4x4, Dec 23, 2008.

  1. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:26 PM
    #1
    chris4x4

    chris4x4 [OP] With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. Moderator

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    TO: GOD

    FROM: THE DOG





    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?



































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?








































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?







































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?
















































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?




































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?



















































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.










































    .............. [​IMG]

    Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?















































    .. ............ [​IMG]
    Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog.
    1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

    2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

    3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.


    4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.


    5. The garbage collector is not stealing our
    stuff.


    6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.


    7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello.'


    8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.


    9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.


    10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.


    11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.


    12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.












































    [​IMG] P.S. When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?


    'Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened.'
    __________________
     
  2. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:30 PM
    #2
    Delmarva

    Delmarva Mayor of TW

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    Nada, Zip, Zilch, Nothing
    lol... nice find :D
     
  3. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:32 PM
    #3
    HerNameIsLucy

    HerNameIsLucy I miss Lucy. :-(

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    Equador. Don't know why.
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    RIP Lucy.
    She's gone but not forgotten.
    that brought a smile. :) thanks.
     
  4. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:34 PM
    #4
    Toy4Life

    Toy4Life 668: The Neighbor of the Beast

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    Lol. One of my dogs flipped the coffee table a couple days ago. He didn't stand up underneath it though, he was laying on his back and stretched.
     
  5. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:35 PM
    #5
    hoosiertaco

    hoosiertaco Well-Known Member

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    Thanks Chris......all I can say is 'hunt 'em up Jack'.....:)
     
  6. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:41 PM
    #6
    kidwok

    kidwok Member

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    Laughed my a** off! And it made me miss my dogs.
     
  7. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:50 PM
    #7
    GreySky72

    GreySky72 Lemon

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    Hahaha nice, I just got back from watching Bolt (on the littles movies screen i've ever seen! I'm in a small town in southern IL) stupid movie but it made me laugh alot and made me wish I had a dog, I miss having dogs!
     
  8. Dec 23, 2008 at 3:56 PM
    #8
    JimBeam

    JimBeam BECAUSE INTERNETS!! Moderator

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    that made me laugh chris...

    my troublemaker is looking at me like im retarded
     
  9. Dec 23, 2008 at 4:39 PM
    #9
    Packman73

    Packman73 ^^^^ 3%er ^^^^

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    Bilstein 5100's (front set @ .85"), OME 885's, chris4x4 anti-Taco-lean spacer on driver's side, Total Chaos UCAs, Rear Leaf Spring TSB, Toytec AALs, Black FJ TT Wheels, BFG 285/75R 16 AT Tires, TRD Exhaust, Viper Alarm, Fog Light Mod, De-badged, Blue LED Dome Light, EZ Clamped Tailgate, Wet Okoles, Satoshi Grill, 5% Tint, Engine Tick Fix, Black Rear Bumper, Black Center Valence, Exhaust Cut At Axle, Thanks for all the help chris4x4!
    Good stuff!!
     
  10. Dec 23, 2008 at 7:29 PM
    #10
    98tacogrande

    98tacogrande Active Member

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    that is so cute!

    i want a dog pretty bad
     
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