Traction control redneck wiring

Hello everyone. As I'm sure many others out there feel the same way, I dispise the way you can't entirely disable the traction control. I have a 2009 trd 6 spd. I put a relay inline with the black 12 gauge wire feeding the abs control module on the passenger wheel well. I have a switch in the cab to shut the abs off when wheel spin is needed. Works great! Only problem is, if I hit the switch, I must shut the vehicle off for it to reset and turn abs off. Same when returning to normal, I flip the switch back then I need to shut my vehicle off for to reset and clear the lights. I need to figure out which wire, and where, I also need to switch for the vehicle computer to reset while still running. I want my makeshift traction control switch to be on the fly, both turning on or off. Hopefully there's a Tacoma wiring expert out there to help me