What's the worst traffic ticket you DIDN'T get?

I've only been pulled over for speeding once in 42 years of driving like a maniac (knocks on wood ...). There was an innocuous Pontiac compact 3 car lengths behind me on I-75 north of Lexington KY when I pulled a slingshot-sideways-and-go-to-warp-speed maneuver to break out of a rolling barricade of blue-hairs in Buicks. It turned out to be an unmarked sheriff's car.

I was nice, he was nice, we shook our heads and joked about it....

He congratulated me on the maneuver I'd made, and kept repeating his amazement that I'd done this and 'just kept speeding up'.

He said he'd pinged me 3 times with his radar, starting with the side-slip (when I shunted across between him and the Trans Am I was pestering and he was targeting). He then said that as a courtesy he'd write up only the lowest of the widely-separated numbers he'd gotten (89 in a 65 zone).

I didn't end up getting a ticket that day... It was a holiday weekend, and the KY cops had so many people pulled over he'd have had to wait 30 minutes on dispatch to 'complete the transaction'. He said he had better things to do and let me off with a good-natured warning ...

 

I was driving thru Texas...dang you have a long state...anyways I was doing 65 when I came up to two semi's that were doing 55 or there abouts. I decided to pass then and I down shifted my 73 Mazda RX-3 with the rotary engine and pass them. Well out of no where a car came straight for me. Well after a short evaluation I decided to give it the gas. Well I passed both semis and right there was a state trooper. I slowed down, pulled over and stated to shake. Well the semis stopped too. Before I realized all what happened the cop walked up to me told me the drivers of the semis told him what happened and he says "slow down we need you in this world" (I'll never forget that phrase). Then states that I was doing 133 in a 55 zone. and he walked away. BTW this happened in 1975.

The other story was involving a female cop in San Diego but I'll save that for later.

 

85 in a 40mph "construction zone"

I was going from a doctor's appointment back to my highschool. I was driving my 98 V6 accord at this point when i was still 17. I think the only mod I had at that point was an exhaust.

I crest a hill on a 2 lane divided highway and see the cop staring right at me parked on a side road. I just let off the gas and coast by knowing he nailed me. Get pulled over right away, license, registration all that boring stuff. Asks me why I was going so fast. I said I was trying to make it back for a calc test (which i was).

He runs my license and it came up clean, says good luck on your test and sends me on my way.