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What's your take on meet your girl's ex?

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by ERdept, Oct 3, 2008.

  1. Oct 3, 2008 at 11:13 PM
    #1
    ERdept

    ERdept [OP] Well-Known Member

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    I am in inherently insanely jealous and possessive person.

    But, my gf has a friend who is an ex. My difficulty in meeting him is that I know that he's been intimate with my gf and can't stand the thought of actually seeing the past made real by meeting a guy who's been with her.

    Youre take and opinons and feelings on meeting and ex?
     
  2. Oct 3, 2008 at 11:16 PM
    #2
    EquinsuOcha

    EquinsuOcha Bourbon

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    I personally don't care.

    Most of that feeling comes from an inability to maintain a friendship with an ex-girlfriend, but people are people, and no matter how hard you try you will never control what they do.

    And if you are able to control what they do, they are very weak-minded.
     
  3. Oct 3, 2008 at 11:20 PM
    #3
    tacomaman06

    tacomaman06 Carolina Alliance: Enforcer

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    getting there....
    +2^^^

    i am married, and even now, she will run into one of her x's and say hello. and of course, im right there saying hello too, but even while we were dating, same thing. you just have to deal with it and not let it bother you, cause chances are.....whoever you meet will have a past, and most will probably have x's that they have remained friends with.
     
  4. Oct 3, 2008 at 11:29 PM
    #4
    eordonez

    eordonez Living vicariously through mjp2

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    ^^+3.....^i mean i get jealous, but not in a matter of bitching about it or not allowing her to do stuff... i mean shes with me now after all....
     
  5. Oct 4, 2008 at 12:07 AM
    #5
    05 X-Runner

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    I never worried about ex's, I always looked at it as " that was then.. This is now ".. She's with you now, dont worry about the past.
     
  6. Oct 4, 2008 at 12:53 AM
    #6
    Oh_Six_Taco_4x4

    Oh_Six_Taco_4x4 Professional High Fiver

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    Just keep in mind that your the one going home with her now. P.S. Don't ever let her see your jealous and possessive. She'll lose respect for you. Good Luck.
     
  7. Oct 4, 2008 at 1:00 AM
    #7
    ERdept

    ERdept [OP] Well-Known Member

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    I know that I'm going home with her. But the image of them two doing the horizontal boogie is what gets me.
     
  8. Oct 4, 2008 at 1:07 AM
    #8
    Oh_Six_Taco_4x4

    Oh_Six_Taco_4x4 Professional High Fiver

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    Stop worring about it. It'll drive you insane.
     
  9. Oct 4, 2008 at 1:51 AM
    #9
    slimcubby

    slimcubby www.slimshidxenonsource.c om Vendor

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    Are you saying she has a friend that she hangs out with and is an ex??? If so f-that but if its just friendly as if they see each other around they say hi then thats fine...

    My best advice to you is even if its burning you up inside if she says hi DO NOT TELL HER. Girls thrive on jealousy and she will subconsiously do it more. If you blow it off and show no care than most of the time she will as well. But if they are friends like buddy buddy and hang out then you either need to get her in check or find a different girl. Ex's and hanging out together as friends do not mix. Why leave reason for doubt in each others minds etc. I don't care how much of a "friend" they are, you are her new best friend!

    Just my .02 and I have been with my girl for over 2 years now and both agree that ex's need to be left alone and in the past.

    Also, it is true 99.9% of the time your going to have a GF that has a past and the first thing you need to do is accept it and get over it or if its that bad of a past then step back and take a look at the whole picture and think to yourself if she is worth it.
     
  10. Oct 4, 2008 at 3:47 AM
    #10
    montgomery_30824

    montgomery_30824 Well-Known Member

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    get over yourself. trust her until she gives you a reason to not trust her, then when that happens, kick her ass to the curb. the guy is a x for a reason. and besides, women are like buses, a new one comes around every 15 minutes. i love my wife to death and we have been together for 5 years and i have told her that, i got along for 25 years before her and i can get along for 25 after her.
     
  11. Oct 4, 2008 at 5:00 AM
    #11
    Ridgerunner

    Ridgerunner Well-Known Member

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    +1-what-you're not enough for her she's gotta keep someone around who used to do her???? I will never understand this mentality. IMO its a shitty thing to put you through and she has nerve having the expectation of you to somehow accept it. Jealousy? Who wouldnt be if you have deep feelings for her? If you let it go on then she will be splitting her attention between the two of you.
     
  12. Oct 4, 2008 at 8:10 AM
    #12
    random hero

    random hero Active Member

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    personaly i've never understood the insane jelousy, to me its just a giant insecurity. I myself don't feel the need to torture myself w/sour feelings and jelousy towards my wife's ex's... Whats the reason to get upset about her having an ex?? It's not going to make your life or hers any easier, there's a reason he's an ex, and a reason she's with you.. don't dwell on her past, it's pointless and will eat you alive inside, and really for no reason man. Like mentioned above, don't let her see how bad it bothers you either, she'll either take it as you don't trust her, or as a giant insecurity, which 99.9% of chicks don't like. Have some self confidence and enjoy the present with your girl
     
  13. Oct 4, 2008 at 11:56 AM
    #13
    slimcubby

    slimcubby www.slimshidxenonsource.c om Vendor

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    Yup agreed with the two comments above... But if its something that she is deliberately doing like calling him to hang out or whatever then you must put your foot down and show some balls. If its something very small though like seeing him at a party or what not then flaunt your girl on your arm give her a kiss when he is around and show YOU ARE THE NEW MAN SUCK ON THIS BROTHA!!!
     
  14. Oct 4, 2008 at 1:42 PM
    #14
    famousfernando

    famousfernando Well-Known Member

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    i agree with slimcubby ex and being friends dont mix, and why are you meeting him in the first place? and i understand that the person is an ex for a reason but you also got with that person for a reason.
     
  15. Oct 4, 2008 at 2:15 PM
    #15
    rick

    rick `

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    it may feel a little awkward at first. who knows, he might be a good dude. as long as she doesn't say his is bigger
     
  16. Oct 4, 2008 at 5:21 PM
    #16
    slimcubby

    slimcubby www.slimshidxenonsource.c om Vendor

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    What the hell are u talking about lol........
     
  17. Oct 5, 2008 at 12:15 PM
    #17
    VeeRFour05

    VeeRFour05 Active Member

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    My girls ex used to be one of my best friends. We stopped seeing eye to eye and I started hanging out with her. Saw him a few times since then, and one of the times I did see him I damn near broke a bottle over his head when my old roomate invited him over and he was being a jackass (puking over the balcony of my apt, grabbed my gfs arm, being a dick in general)
     
  18. Oct 5, 2008 at 3:16 PM
    #18
    05 X-Runner

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    Grabbed her arm ?.... I would have beat him into next week, fvckin drunk assholes :mad:.. Puking and being a dick is one thing, touch my wife or GF your ass is mine
     
  19. Oct 5, 2008 at 3:30 PM
    #19
    Ridgerunner

    Ridgerunner Well-Known Member

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    see? this whole "x" thang is NEVER good!!
     
  20. Oct 5, 2008 at 4:40 PM
    #20
    red06toy

    red06toy Well-Known Member

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    Ive been lucky in that my gfs exes are all jerk offs who she doesnt like and has no contact with. however when we first started dating (within 2 months) one of these assholes starts texting her nasty messages while we were laying in bed! I lost my mind. She didn't want him contacting her so she kinda let me handle it like i wanted. I called the jerk and he proceeded to be a telephone tough guy threatening me and saying totally inapropriate thigs about her. When he was done I promised him if I ever saw him he was gonna test his manhood. Well I did, he was drinkn with a bunch of his fruity buddys at a club in town. I walked in with kris (my gf) shes like oh my god hes here. I said would you care if i went up to him? she said fu*k him he desevres wht he gets. I went up to him, called him out on his comments; he has no memory, his buddies scatter. i gave him a chance to man up and defend what he said to my face. He wouldnt. last thing i said to him was "If I was you Id be so ashamed I wouldnt be able to look at myself in the mirror after tonight". Then I walked back to kris grabbed her ass and kissed her while we walked out.:cool:
     
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