A Frog Walks Into a Bank.....

A frog walks into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patty Whack.



"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.



Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

(You're gonna love this.)

The bank manager looks back at her and says,
"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."


Never take life too seriously.

 

Nice!

 

Well that ones on its last legs.

 

A man walks into a bar.

And says ouch.

No really...

(Warning: multi-cultural reference ahead)

Did you hear about that popular Vietnamese soup restaurant? They alway have a line.
I believe it's the Pho Queue.

In fact I heard they opened another one.
The Pho Queue II.

 

Two snowpeople standing in a field.

One says to the other, "Do you smell carrots, too?"

 

Guy- walks into a crowded bar with a loaded gun

Bartender yells - "no guns allowed!"

Guy yells - "dont care, Im about shoot everone here who slept with my wife!"

Dude in background yells- "you aint got enough bullets!"