Dad jokes

What do call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

Still, no eye deer.

 

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?


Still
No eye deer

 

I still have no eye deer

 

oops Charlie beat me to it. Sorry Charlie

an oldie but goodie:

 

What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?

Elephino!!

 

Divorced Dad joke: Why do Women wear make-up and put on perfume?





Cause they are ugly and they stink.

 

Have you seen the new pirate movie?

Don't bring the children, I hear it's rated AAARRRRRRR...

 

Bwahahahaha

If my wife ever tries that on my tattoos I'll freak out

 

What’s a little crayon?

Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems."

 

I was riding with a neighborhood friend of my dads who was pretty funny. He was driving down the road and came to one of those yellow "Stop Ahead" signs. He stopped, put the truck in park and got out. He looked around the front of the truck, then asked me to come out. When I got up front, he said "Do you see it?" I said "See what?" He said "The head. The sign to stop, a head."

 

What do the people in Dubai and Abu Dhabi not have in common?






People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones and the people in Abu Dhabi do.

 

What do you call dental x-rays?



Tooth Pics

What kind of DR, is Dr. Pepper?


Fizzzician

 

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

 

Earlier this morning, my son asked me if I had seen the dog bowl.

I responded "No, I didn't even know he could!"