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wedding drama

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by jackhart, Jan 23, 2012.

  1. Jan 23, 2012 at 5:03 PM
    #1
    jackhart

    jackhart [OP] Well-Known Member

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    what creates more drama than weddings, right?

    so my wife and her sister are bridesmaids in their brother's wedding party. his fiancee is great, we all love her.

    the bride to be's best friend - also in the wedding party - sends out an email to all the other bridesmaids, including my wife and her sister, about the wedding shower. basically "please send me $250 each to cover the cost of the shower. this does not include your shower gift."

    this kind of shocked both me and my wife, as every shower my wife ever attended - including her own - was paid for by the bride's parents. after asking around a little bit, we now understand that this isn't "unheard of," but just wondering what all of you who have wedding experience have to say.

    my wife's sister is married to a guy who is currently unemployed. they don't have the money to shell out for this, in addition to a shower gift, followed by an out of town wedding (hotel) and wedding gift the following month. while we aren't in as bad a shape, to be honest, we are not all that excited about the expenditure either, but it's my wife's brother. i just think it's kind of rude.

    my wife asked the girl planning the shower for a breakdown of the shower costs and got a pretty rude response. my wife's sister called the girl to explain her situation and got an even ruder response. after that, today we got another email from this girl to "everyone" stating that she would take care of all the "deposits" thereby reducing everyone else's contribution to $180 apiece. my wife still wants to know how the money is broken down/being spent...

    that's better, but i'm still kind of put off by the whole thing. thoughts?
     
  2. Jan 23, 2012 at 5:20 PM
    #2
    Maverick904

    Maverick904 Resident Fishing Expert

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    Baby mama drama is worse than wedding drama
     
  3. Jan 23, 2012 at 5:35 PM
    #3
    jackhart

    jackhart [OP] Well-Known Member

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    yeah well the kicker is, they are having the batchelorette party the evening after the shower. of course the girls have to pay for that night on the town too. this whole thing is a trainwreck.
     
  4. Jan 23, 2012 at 5:56 PM
    #4
    Joben7726

    Joben7726 wes mantooth ™

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    Court wedding. Tell them that.

    Dude that is ridiculous. I know its family and what not, but holy bejeebus.
     
  5. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:00 PM
    #5
    IDtrucks

    IDtrucks Just out for a rip are ya bud?

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    if they want people to show up, don't make them pay. thats pretty dam rude, especially considering there are still tons of people who are not in the best financial shape.
     
  6. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:01 PM
    #6
    jackhart

    jackhart [OP] Well-Known Member

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    i'm glad you agree. still waiting for someone to tell me this is frickin' normal!!
     
  7. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:02 PM
    #7
    Boerseun

    Boerseun Well-Known Member

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    The way I have seen it is that everyone attending bring something to eat, ( potluck style finger food etc.) decorations are done by the close friends who organize the party, but it should not be that expensive, maybe $20 to $50 each.
    Unfortunately there is no way to change the girl's mind if she is set on doing this.
    Good luck.
     
  8. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:04 PM
    #8
    Blackshirts

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    I wouldn't pay when you are asked to attend.

    Tell the wife to talk to her bro
     
  9. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:04 PM
    #9
    jackhart

    jackhart [OP] Well-Known Member

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    that's how i heard it was done way back when. someone hosted it at their house (not a catering hall or whatever), and each person brought food.

    just found out this girl wants an open bar at a freaking wedding shower! :mad: you know, where they open gifts like the pots and pans and shit! granted if "I" had to go to something like that I'd want to get dead drunk, but this is a boatload of women we are talking about...wtf??
     
  10. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:07 PM
    #10
    kimo

    kimo Well-Known Member

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    Mucho dinero for sure, I wouldnt want my wife to feel obligated to pay that much, unless they are getting a full day spa treatment with it .
     
  11. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:09 PM
    #11
    mntbiker2008

    mntbiker2008 First I derp.. then I herp

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    Want to attend this blah blah blah??? oh that will be $180... yeah fuck that. lol I wouldn't go... and if I ever get married... court wedding it will be. then we can go home, bang, and she can make me a sammich when we are done... and then we will go about our lives... keepin it simple. :cool:
     
  12. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:10 PM
    #12
    MightyMouse-SCT

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    I wouldnt send crap . They are up to something .
     
  13. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:11 PM
    #13
    jgwheeler17

    jgwheeler17 I'm a zit. Get it?

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  14. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:11 PM
    #14
    MightyMouse-SCT

    MightyMouse-SCT Well-Known Member

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    And why are they getting married if he is unemployed . Wow
     
  15. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:12 PM
    #15
    Yoytoda

    Yoytoda The Little Truck That Could

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    my wife threw her sisters wedding shower about $100 per brides made. and the bachelorette party was $200 a bridesmade. Its super expensive for the bride's shit.

    Not unheard of...
     
  16. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:16 PM
    #16
    757southpaw

    757southpaw Well-Known Member

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    In a blue collar world...THIS IS NOT NORMAL!!
     
  17. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:18 PM
    #17
    jackhart

    jackhart [OP] Well-Known Member

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    no the groom (my wife's brother) is not unemployed. my wife's sister - also one of the bridesmaids - is married to a guy who is unemployed. she truly cannot afford this.

    i just found out the bride's mom knows all about this and approves of it. she must be so amused...
     
  18. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:18 PM
    #18
    11TRD

    11TRD Soon to be west coast

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    Hell no! If that kind of money is being spent then you deserve a break down of what the money is going towards. And it's not rude to ask for this.
     
  19. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:20 PM
    #19
    jackhart

    jackhart [OP] Well-Known Member

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    ok fill me in a little bit. when and how was this decision made? did your wife discuss this with the others beforehand to come to a price? is there some reason your wife's parents didn't pay for the shower? just trying to understand the thinking a little bit...
     
  20. Jan 23, 2012 at 6:20 PM
    #20
    MightyMouse-SCT

    MightyMouse-SCT Well-Known Member

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    Oh my bad . I've never heard of this before.
     
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